Kids and Health: Today, my mother-in-law visited. She saw my 5-year-old son rip... - FML

By annie - 14/10/2018 12:00

Today, my mother-in-law visited. She saw my 5-year-old son rip open a chip bag, causing chips go everywhere. She got up in his face and started screaming at him about how he has an "attitude problem". He doesn't, he's autistic and genuinely has trouble with food packaging. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 225

You deserved it 230

Dementia or hate? You decide

But there's panic on the streets of Carlisle

Are you ready to ruuuuuumbbbbbble?

Black Lives Matter

By jack1057 - 14/07/2020 05:01

Today, I was on my way home and there were BLM protestors, who I have no problem with, but my car was parked where they were and I had to sit there for three hours until they left so I could drive off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 498

You deserved it 270

By random - 29/04/2013 21:11 - Canada

Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 190

You deserved it 64 635

By HereKittyKitty - 01/12/2013 20:27 - United States - Carlsbad

Today, after being convinced that my cat had worms due to eating so much food and still looking really skinny, I found out that my neighbor secretly lets his dog in through my pet door while I'm at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 801

You deserved it 2 873

By DesperateBich - 28/11/2018 14:00

Today, I was in band rehearsing for a big concert coming up. Since the band was practicing with the orchestra and there weren’t enough seats, we had to stand. My back was facing everyone when my friend tapped me on the shoulder and pointed to my ass. I got my period and everyone saw the stain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 043

You deserved it 211

By Anonymous - 01/11/2012 04:24 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I worked up the courage to give a guy my number. I wrote it down on a piece of paper, tore it in half and gave it to him. Later, I noticed I'd given him the wrong, blank half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 509

You deserved it 11 891

By Jeff - 02/08/2019 04:00 - United States

Today, after a stay at the hospital for two broken legs, I finally got home and attempted to relax. My dad went to hand me the remote and dropped it right on my nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 572

You deserved it 120

By Anonymous - 24/08/2019 04:00

Today, I saw a teenager knock over a woman, so I rushed over to help her up. Turns out, she had a knife and thanked me by stealing my wallet and phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 883

You deserved it 221

By lonelyhubby - 08/07/2009 04:16 - United States

Today, I found out that my wife had been debating leaving me for an old boyfriend from high school. They rekindled their relationship on Facebook, and talking on the cell phone. Both things I insisted she have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 353

You deserved it 12 037

By Anonymous - 23/02/2016 05:01 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I farted at a crowded concert, and people started commenting on said fart. I specifically went out of my way to eat certain foods all day so that it wouldn't happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 232

You deserved it 2 754

Back to the drawing board

By BackIGo - 15/01/2021 02:01 - Australia

Today, I finished birthday shopping for my husband, my son, and a close friend, who all have birthdays within a week. I was proud of myself for being organized, until I remembered: my husband has a twin sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 707

You deserved it 149

By Anonymous - 23/07/2012 07:35 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I mowed over a bird while mowing the lawn. It wasn't dead, so I had to mow over it a second time to put it out of its misery. Now there are pieces of dead bird all over my lawn and I can't sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 065

You deserved it 19 186

By Quicky5_ - 03/11/2015 06:58 - United States - Jasper

Today, at work, my coworker's belongings went missing. Infuriated, she accused me of stealing, because I'm black and "stereotypes don't just make themselves." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 113

You deserved it 2 475

By addie19 - 19/01/2010 19:25 - United States

Today, I found out the antibiotics I'm taking can cause you to vomit unexpectedly. In the car. While driving. To work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 660

You deserved it 2 919

By lababy - 15/11/2011 17:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 663

You deserved it 21 015

By gvmfvr - 08/05/2014 20:48 - France - Fontenay-sous-bois

Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 093

You deserved it 3 950

WTF dude?

By 4evalone - 22/04/2016 18:06 - United States

Today, the man I love, who broke my heart by leaving me a few months ago, showed up to a family event and pulled off the most elaborate, romantic proposal I've ever seen. He was proposing to my cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 271

You deserved it 1 642

By Beast - 30/03/2013 06:57 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I was cast as beast in my high school's production of Beauty and the Beast. My Grandma's input? "At least they won't need any makeup." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 083

You deserved it 3 844

Mixing it up

By Kayleigh - 16/03/2021 21:59 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I found out my boyfriend cheated on me with his dad's ex-girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 150

You deserved it 75

By kanepie - 05/07/2019 04:03

Today, we were driving home from NYC to Knoxville after our flight got cancelled, and we had to drive with 3 strangers for 13 hours. We are now stuck in Who-Knows-Where, Virginia, with two blown tires, because a metal plate fell off an 18-wheeler in front of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 727

You deserved it 118

By Not Again! - 14/06/2019 04:16

Today, while riding a massive draft horse, the horse thought it would be fun to walk under a very low apple tree that sat level with his back. A branch hit me and made me fall off onto a coil of barbed wire, twisting my ankle in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 638

You deserved it 327

By datingmrpicky - 22/08/2011 03:44 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 450

You deserved it 36 774

By BirdBrain - 14/12/2017 19:00

Today, I discovered that I don't have a college fund. My mother stole the money when she divorced my dad and he never bothered to tell me. Now he's offered to pay my tuition if I go to a military academy. If I don't take the offer, he wants me to move out by next Friday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 933

You deserved it 383

By Anonymous - 20/04/2016 14:34 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, after a fight, I caught my sister rubbing my toothbrush on the inside of our grimy toilet. This is why I have trust issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 061

You deserved it 1 538

OCD

By Anonymous - 23/01/2021 02:01 - Germany - Ebersbach

Today, the room I am renting from an old lady is stuffed with porcelain figures, etc. I carefully put them into the drawers to create some space for the books I need for college. While I was gone, she used her key and put all the porcelain figures back on the shelves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 101

You deserved it 98

By Dipping Tired - 20/04/2016 23:17 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, while half asleep, I dipped my finger in ketchup instead of a fry, and bit down on it so hard I needed stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 705

You deserved it 7 123

Cool story, tell it again

By GGimabeast - 29/07/2010 04:14 - United States

Spicy

Today, I celebrated my birthday. My mom invited a bunch of my relatives over, and they started telling funny stories of when I was a kid. My mom decided that then was an appropriate time to talk about how she caught me looking at porn the other night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 246

You deserved it 12 369

By Konstantine - 05/10/2009 13:55 - New Zealand

Today, I saw photos of my boyfriend at his 25th birthday party. The one he told me was cancelled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 456

You deserved it 3 531

By Anonymous - 19/03/2019 08:00 - New Zealand - Palmerston North

Today, I've reached a level of tired I didn't think was possible. I've had less than 3 hours sleep in the last 72 hours and have not slept more than 20 minutes each stretch because my newborn is so unsettled. The baby has been peacefully sleeping for the last 3 hours and I can't sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 963

You deserved it 261

By Anonymous - 16/05/2015 17:46 - United Kingdom - Southampton

Today, a couple asked me to donate my eggs so they could start a family. When I refused, I was called heartless by my ex-husband and the woman he cheated on me with for over two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 836

You deserved it 2 385

By sickly - 20/01/2011 05:47 - United States

Today, I came to school really sick because I had to take an important exam. After I finally finished, I accidentally sneezed on my answer sheet right before turning it in. The teacher refused to take it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 507

You deserved it 4 467

Suspicious Minds

By Kelly - 29/11/2016 18:57

Today, I discovered that my 17-year-old daughter received several weird deposits from Paypal. I checked her phone to discover that she had changed the password for the first time in years. Fearing drugs, I confronted her. She broke down and confessed to selling rare digital Pokemon on eBay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 713

You deserved it 2 391

By Anonymous - 31/03/2018 15:00

Today, a customer asked a question I couldn’t answer. I asked if she would wait while I consulted someone else, but she spat in my face and stormed off. My manager saw, wrote me up for refusing to help, and gave the woman a gift card for her troubles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 920

You deserved it 232

Delusional

By sealpop09 - 30/06/2011 14:36 - United States

Today, my dad gave me a speech about being gay. He said he'll accept me if that's who I truly am, but he wants me to think it over first. I'm an actor in a play. I had to explain the concept of wearing costumes and acting like someone else to him. For the third time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 987

You deserved it 4 217

By Anonymous - 01/02/2012 20:21 - United States

Today, my morning sickness has been so bad that my husband's farts send me running to the bathroom. He thinks it's hilarious, and has been following me around all day trying to crack one off in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 152

You deserved it 3 986

By Anonymous - 16/05/2011 22:15 - United States

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. He said he would have done it two weeks ago but he needed someone to drive him around while his car was getting repaired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 203

You deserved it 4 417

By 8sq - 11/06/2011 01:32 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that yes, a fork can get stuck in your braces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 567

You deserved it 16 328

By fuckoffandfuckoffagainyoucunt - 17/08/2012 16:27 - United Kingdom - Sittingbourne

Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 526

You deserved it 2 754

By missmycomp - 12/11/2009 14:36 - Singapore

Today, I returned home for the first time in a year, and found my entire computer missing. I asked my grandma about this, and she told me that she threw "the TV" away because it "no longer responded to the remote control." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 717

You deserved it 3 125

By Kalaina - 25/10/2009 04:36 - France

Today, I received a three-time forwarded message which I thought would turn out to be a random chain message. Turns out my boyfriend didn't want to send me the "break-up text" himself and figured it would get to me eventually after sending it to all my best friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 462

You deserved it 2 508

By weirdedout - 24/05/2010 15:14 - United States

Spicy

Today, while sitting at a red light, my mother asks "Do you have any intimacy questions?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 559

You deserved it 5 215

Add a comment - Reply to : #

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

Kico McAwesome 9

Send a private message

Tuesday 2 October 2018 11:01

What a complete b*tch no matter if he's special needs or not she soukdnt ever talk to another person's child that way. I am sorry she did that. You must be very unhappy I hope your husband speaks. With her about this.

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 14:16

You don't scream at a five year old. Period. My little girl is 4 and also on the spectrum, and while my family is excellent...if they weren't? She wouldn't see them until she was 18 and could make that decision herself, or they bent over backwards and changed their ways. This is a huge FML for your little boy, and it's one for you UNLESS you knew that she was a b*tch and this wasn't shocking and surprising...and you kicked her out in seconds.

Comments

Kico McAwesome 9

Send a private message

Tuesday 2 October 2018 11:01

What a complete b*tch no matter if he's special needs or not she soukdnt ever talk to another person's child that way. I am sorry she did that. You must be very unhappy I hope your husband speaks. With her about this.

BurnInDemonFire 32

Send a private message

Tuesday 2 October 2018 11:59

Give the hag a taste of her own medicine.

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 14:16

You don't scream at a five year old. Period. My little girl is 4 and also on the spectrum, and while my family is excellent...if they weren't? She wouldn't see them until she was 18 and could make that decision herself, or they bent over backwards and changed their ways. This is a huge FML for your little boy, and it's one for you UNLESS you knew that she was a b*tch and this wasn't shocking and surprising...and you kicked her out in seconds.

The_candyman 13

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 17:49

But it's fun to scream at 5 year olds. they need a parent who has a back bone. I remember when crying for stuff I was always asked do I need a real reason to cry. I tell my kid the same thing for the past 4 years and shes almost 8.

BurnInDemonFire 32

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 19:46

The_candyman You deserve to be screamed at. And smacked. In the mouth.

GrumpyGrinch 23

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 16:34

There is no reason to let her see the grandchild any more. Any child at 5 can struggle with packagings, hey, even adults not always open them smoothly. I assume she knows there is a reason why stuff is more challenging to a particular child. She does not deserve to be around the child and child doesn't deserve to around toxic her.

Chloe555_fml 27

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 17:22

That’s when you get in HER face about HER attitude problem. If not then show her the door.

The_candyman 13

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 17:47

Really want to know what you did. I kicked my mom out of my apartment before because she didnt respect me and my family. Hope you didnt show your child you wont stand up for them. that would be the true fml. If you know your child has a problem with food packaging who gave them an unopened food package? dont set your child up for failure not sure it was a learning experiance for your child or you.

bluejello2001 17

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 18:34

Maybe the child went and got the food themselves? Or said they wanted to try to open it? 5 year olds, whether or not they are neurotypical, tend to have an major independent streak.

screwyousideways 17

Send a private message

Monday 15 October 2018 1:27

this is my biggest nightmare. because I will ban my mother if she disrespects my children by deciding she knows how to raise my future children better than I do...

WHSKitty4ever 23

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 19:24

Slap the stupid bitch and don’t let her near your child again

WHSKitty4ever 23

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 19:30

Be like Beyoncé in the movie “Obsessed.”

1gullible_bugger 33

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 20:08

Your mother in law is a moron. how does she not know your son is autistic?

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 20:13

Won't believe it, won't listen, too narcissistic to care. Take your pick.

ThrottleJockey 34

Send a private message

Sunday 14 October 2018 20:18

Sounds like your mother-in-law is on the spectrum, the bitch spectrum.

Nearly

Today, I was diagnosed with anorexia. My mother still keeps on calling me a fat fuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29

You deserved it 3

Today, I found out my mother listens to my therapy sessions. She’s the reason I need therapy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27

You deserved it 1

Spicy

Spicy

Today, my college fuck buddy started sending my wife our dirty chat logs. Not only have I not spoken to her in years, but the logs are time/date stamped from when Obama was still President. She's never met my wife and I have no idea what she hopes to get out of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 131

Today, I’d been bicurious for years but always much too shy to seek out a woman to attempt intimacy. Well, I finally hooked up with a girl I’ve had a crush on for a while. Not only was it an amazing, mind-blowing experience, she also left me with a crotch searing yeast infection from hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 233

You deserved it 299