By SlickMcK - 05/06/2010 21:14 - United States

Today, my mother asked me if I'd heard of anal sex. Before I could fully process her question, she explained that it's dangerous because the tissues of the anus are finer and more susceptible to STDs. There were still forty minutes left in our car ride. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 511
You deserved it 4 336

Same thing different taste

Top comments

perdix 29

Tell her you need "a nap" and to turn off auto-correct on your iPhone.

perdix 29

You should ask her how Dad gives it to her. That will make the last 39 minutes of your ride silent . . . or more disturbing than the Blue Waffle.


first! eww I'd never catch myself talking about this stuff with my mom!!

Hey... there is never a bad time to learn about sexual transmitted diseases people!

wow that suck parents can be so alkward!

iSitt 0

these are scary times to be a parent

too much anal sex can lead to your rectum collapsing..just saying

TurboTalon 0

When I was in highschool I walked into my kitchen and my mom said " oral sex is sex" to me... (she's religious)

Oh no, you have a parent that gives enough of a shit to try to educate you about sex. My mother always made for open communication about sex and because of that I'll never be a teenage mother and I can count the amount of people I've slept with or fooled around with on one hand.

FMLoverAgain 7

yes oral sex is sex. that's why it's called " oral sex". when you play with a person's genital it's sex.

whaat? now I won't be able to read yaoi without thinking about the technical stuff D:

um who hasnt heard of anal sex mom?

I hate it when people complain about these things, I mean, it happens to everyone. So, be a big kid, suck it up and deal with it, okay?

birds and the bees the over protective mom way

bARbi3_d0Ll 0

anal sex seems creepy to me  its like a rape postion and i'm guessing its painful

your mom thinks you take it in the poop chute

rawrcupcakesz 0

eww anal is gross. Good thing I don't do that:)

You should have replied that of course you have heard of it. Then tell her you've been doing it for 3 years now. That'll show her. Oh yeah tell her you love it.

pseudolife 4

Yeahhhhh...awkward. FYL, indeed.

If you are going to do it use plenty of lube. ; )

"Im your daughter, mom, of course I've heard of anal sex"

NotYourOrdinary7 6
rohosoccer08 1

that's sick, I don't see what the satisfaction in doing it is for guys

laideehawk 6

This reminds me of the old Masengill douche commercial. The mother goes to her daughter, "Do you ever get that not so fresh feeling?". This is a definite FML for op!

iSwag 0

my bad I meant 40-lie 50 lie...and all who haven't tried it will

rohosoccer08 1

haha 66 why are you so sure?

rawrcupcakesz 0

66- and you know I lied because? I haven't done anal and I'm not planning too in the future.

And that is why reverse cowgirl prevails!

iSwag 0

wrote two comments...none posted...wish modes would stop hating on me :-/

sounds like a mom who cares. YDI for complaining

littlemissdqgirl 8

What is so great about anal? Ones a$$ is not made for such things. *shakes head* Op give your mom a break. She just wants you to be educated about your body.

her mom watches too much oprah or The View. they always have the stories about how teens do oral and anal so they can still claim to be virgins. my mom was like that too but i was 23 at the time

FMLhockeyNHL 0

Why are women such ******* when it comes to anal?

FMLoverAgain 7

i want to try it with you iswag

perdix 29

Tell her you need "a nap" and to turn off auto-correct on your iPhone.

I once saw a puppy tale a nap. It was really cute. But the damn hippies chopped it up and smoked it. I bet they didn't even get high. Damn hippies.

tienjt 3

Been watching the History Channel, afatmonkey?

scubadiver8888 0

bet it's a guy that posted this

foodman 0
blackllama 0
shayyyyy 0
perdix 29

You should ask her how Dad gives it to her. That will make the last 39 minutes of your ride silent . . . or more disturbing than the Blue Waffle.

number 9. haahahahaha. you disturbed my mind. blue waffle is GNAR as **** x3

Nothing is more disturbing than a blue waffle. NOTHING

i eat two blue waffles every morning... with extra syrup >:O

chapachristina4 0

#9-bomg the 'special fried rice' is way worse than the blue waffle!!

dizziedanni123 0

...i wish i didnt just look that up.... *gags*

chapachristina4 0

haha! that's how I was when I first saw it xD

Special fried rice in a blue waffle? *shudder*

perdix 29

chapachristina, I'm going to leave "special fried rice" alone, because I've already looked up "felching."

I also wish I hadn't looked that up. I'm afraid to look up felching.

srsly tho, every kid in my grade has heard of it and im 13. one of my frends has even done it.

ewww is he a guy? I'm a 13 year old guy but I only like sucking

ajallday 0

you only like sucking dick whaaat?

laideehawk 6

34-some things are best left unsaid....tmi

I think I know 34 o.o because, I know this kid Alex, that does a lot of weird names "AlexTheHusky", "AlexTheGayHusky" and stuff like that... LOL. Sorry, a bit random and off topic.

kittycat0906 3

Wow u sound just like my bff "I'm not gay i just like sucking" LMAO!

lol I'm 13 and I'm a girl and have done it XD

KiddNYC1O 20

99- that said, I think I've seen you on Maury... off to boot camp you go!

I am sorry to hear that someone that young is engaging in that. One would think it a healthier choice to simply not partake in any bodily activity at that age. Seriously, have you a low image of yourself? Just don't play that game.

I totally agree with you, 106. I thought we had to worry about kids just having regular sex at you kids are having anal? Jesus, what is the world coming to? Some things just aren't MEANT for little children. Anal sex is one of them. *dies*


that must have been a great ride(x

hehehe sorry i just had to laugh at the way you worded that and now i feel immature. :(

ticklemechantell 0

I laughed too, dnt feel bad xD