Today, my Marine friend got back from his tour of duty overseas. We went out for drinks to celebrate his return. His own form of celebration was to pick a fight with a returning Navy SEAL and his friends. We lost. Badly. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, some muscle-head showed up at my house and started beating on me. Turned out my son had been posing online as a Navy SEAL, using a picture of me, and had dared this guy to come over and fight him. FML
Today, I went to my high school reunion. I was super excited to see what everyone had done in their lives. The nerdy guy I bullied is now a U.S. Marine and already has two deployments in Afghanistan under his belt. He looked at me in his dress blues and said, "I remember you." FML
Today, aside from clearing out my bank accounts and having an affair, the kicker was finding out my fiancé planned on taking himself and his mistress to Cancun for his birthday, while I would be attending the Marine Corps boot camp. FML
Today, after nearly 2 years of continuous fighting in Afghanistan, my unit came home. We were booed at the airport. FML
Today, I met the girl who dumped me because the distance between us was too great. We're in the same city again. She's now dating a Marine in Iraq. FML
Today, my boyfriend got drunk and had a fistfight with a dumb teenager, which was bad enough, but he also lost the fight, which was just pathetic and embarrassing. FML
Today, I woke up and I'm still in the Marine Corps. FML
Today, I got back from an 8 month deployment but rather than being pleased to see me my wife wanted to continue the same argument we were having the day I left. I miss being shot at. FML
Today, my boyfriend got done with Marine combat training. The first thing he asked for weren't pictures of me but pictures of his car. Missed you too babe. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant with my boyfriend. He wound up drinking a whole bottle of wine, and when the bill came, he drunkenly yelled at the waiter, claiming it should be free, because he's in the military "fighting for your freedom." He's a mechanic in the National Guard. FML
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Top comments
AmpulexCompressa 0
Navy SEALS are like grim reapers in training. Why would you fight them.
sakurachan04 0
That sucks, but... You DEFINITELY deserved that. You don't pick fights with a Navy SEAL unless you want to nearly die or actually die... Tell your Marine friend to grow a brain before he thinks of picking another fight.
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Comments (191)
ntraer 0
future marine... all branches have there own special force teams. a child will not win in a fight with an adult. nor is it likely that a standard army,navy,air force or marine will win a fight with a special force.
dracorna 0
# 113 LOL ...No Not really...I can type pretty fast...hehe.
acoti 0
#41 that was awesomely funny!
lilgirl420 0
duh, marines are paid by the seals!
xlogan123 0
YDI for your belligerence. Shame that our culture glorifies it, though.
D_Thr33 0
SAS would have pwnt you both, then ejaculated on your mangled, bloody corpses.
TrickFlowMustang 0
That's a celebration! I went out drinking with a SEAL team once, but they insisted that they weren't military. They said they were "zamboni drivers" and "gumball machine repairmen". Pretty cool guys.
durtysanch 0
marines suck everyone can become a marine, it takes a REAL MAN to become a NAVY SEAL.
wasted0087 0
Seriously!? Seriously!? Omfg! ******' stupid. YTDI way to go... Marines aren't stupid so much as cocky... But they ain't no match for SEALs... What Team was he in?
D11Churchkill 8
marines! oorah! o ps my grampa-2nd cousin were marines cousin blew up lost his leg in m-rap them pulled his friends out of fire. he's legless