Today, my husband announced that he wants to separate emotionally. Meanwhile, he still wants me to cook and clean for him while he dates his new girlfriend. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my husband just told me that he no longer loves me but keeps me around to handle his finances. FML
Today, my husband of 3 years, who I have a 1 year old daughter with, told me he wants a divorce, but who knows, maybe in the future we can "date." FML
Today, my husband of 12 years announced that he wants a divorce and that he hadn't liked me in YEARS. FML
Today, my husband had the cheek to ask me, “What’s for dinner tonight?” and “I have no clean slacks for tomorrow can you wash me some?” no more than 10 minutes after he told me he wants us to see other people. FML
Today, I found out that my fiancé has been talking to another girl behind my back about how much he hates being with me. Turns out he’s been talking to her everyday for 3 months, and she kept pushing him to leave me, but he was only staying because I cook for him. FML
Today, my husband of 4 years announced that he doesn’t love me anymore and that he’s leaving me for his coworker who he met 2 months ago. I helped him find that job. It’s like I aided in the destruction of my own marriage. FML
Today, after an argument a month ago, my husband has refused to do any cooking since. After a month without his food, I’ve realised at this point in our marriage his cooking is literally the only thing about him I like anymore. I think I want a divorce. Over food. What an end to a marriage. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to break up. But not until after our anniversary tomorrow, because he's already gotten dinner reservations for us. FML
Today, my wife announced that she wanted a divorce. She'd actually started dating another man a few months ago, but she wanted to drag our marriage out as long as possible just in case her new relationship fell through. FML
Today, I found out that my husband wants to leave me. I got the message loud and clear when his girlfriend forwarded me screenshots of all their texts. FML
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Top comments
dessyrae 0
Oh hellll nah!
margie2194 12
Thats when you slap him and take all his money.
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Comments (309)
br0ccoli 15
Tell him to hire a maid and get your ass out of there! Find yourself someone who loves and appreciates you. Maybe when his dick shrivels up from a disease he contracts, he will realize what he lost.
Tokyo_Atom 7
husband sleeping + wax strips + ball pubes = muahahhaaa!
KiddNYC1O 22
PG-13 Lorena Bobbit.
jonnied23 20
Put laxatives in his food, then clear plastic wrap over the toilet that should teach him.
skristen69 0
Oh yes that would be ******* hilarious. The next FML is going to be from him about this situation.
challan 19
I was going to say bake a nice chocolate exlax cake! You beat me too it!
darkestbarbie 11
But then she would have to clean his piss and...that's just not fun.
princess_boss_ch 0
F your life
SkoomaKi 28
Tell him he can pack his shit and take his "emotion" with him.
TheDevilsLily 5
My soon to be ex-husband wanted the same deal. He even went as far as telling me he'd live half the time with me and half with her because he didn't want a divorce cause he didn't want to walk away from his beautiful family. Needless to say he's living with her full time and miserable :)
lollipop77_fml 6
Karma's a bitch - but she's gooooood!! I know divorce isn't easy, but if he's cheated once, he'll do it again. Good for you for not putting up with the bull crap.
lollipop77_fml 6
Reply with - "You want to be separated emtionally? Well, I put a lot of emotion into my cooking and cleaning - so you're shit out of luck!!!" Then kick his arse to the curb...
honeybeebre16 3
-some people really take marriage as a joke smh;
THE_A_TEEN 28
This the part where you kick him right in his balls.
Calyx_fml 22
It sounds like he is already separated emotionally. Time to separate literally and get a divorce.
icallbullshit 3
This is like the only proper comment I've seen on this fml. Too bad it came from a guy, still though, props.
psuedodragon 23
What do you mean "too bad it came from a guy"? Are guys not allowed to be smart and insightful? "Never poltically correct" my ass, you're just rude.
icallbullshit 3
I MEANT THAT THE FEMALES HERE were to blinded by emotions to think rationally, he's the first one that suggested that op move on and get a divorce. Nothing about mutilation of genitalia, setting fire to his belongings, or hurting him in general. That's why I said its too bad it came from a guy.
miss_la_rue 6
I agree. What he's asking for is nothing short of ridiculous. Those are the perks of marriage, and if he doesn't want the emotions, he doesn't get the other stuff. Also, 269, I take exception to your comment. Seeing as 268 comments were posted before yours, and quite a few were by women, I can't help but be offended. Many of those comments were perfectly rational about moving on a getting a divorce. Vindictive, yes, but irrational, no. You're falling back on the 'all women are incapable of being rational' argument that is nothing but a bullshit thought fed to men to make them feel better and invalidate female opinions. You might want to reconsider it.
icallbullshit 3
The ones before this dudes comments only like one was rational, he was the first one to say time for a divorce which is whats due here, a divorce. Not a slap, not 'take half his shit/cash' not poison him, the girl above me got the wrong message I said its too bad it came from a guy and that it should be coming from a girl. Moving away from the point what makes everyone think that op's man won't take revenge if she hits him or worse, just leaving is the best option. I really do hope that the men and women with appalling comments are only doing so because they can with the safety of anonymity, if not then :s.