By uggg - 23/01/2015 18:09 - United States - Seattle

Today, my girlfriend told me that her fear of PDA has gotten so bad, she doesn't think she'll even be able to kiss me on our wedding day. Her parents are going be there and she can't imagine showing affection in front of other people, let alone her parents. FML
I agree, your life sucks 35 625
You deserved it 3 224

Same thing different taste

Top comments

That's tough. There's nothing wrong with her, she's just very insecure. Either she'll get over it or feel EXTREMELY guilty /: Hopefully her opinion changes as you help her pick up her self esteem

Comments

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

#42 that's the joke he was trying to make.

@55, "joke"? Could either of you, or anyone for that matter, explain why that was funny or something to constitute a "joke"? Can you explain where the humor is there? Because I'm not seeing it. At all.

#58 - Rape jokes are sensitive for most people because sexualized violence is more taboo than regular violence, which we're apparently desensitized to, considering the immense amount of people who continue to jokingly (and seriously) suggest assaulting other people in their comments. Personally, I think rape jokes can still be pulled off with a little finesse, but you're right, #9 dove into that one head first.

Rape jokes are sensitive for most people not because of any taboo, but because it's a devastating, despicable crime. There is no such thing as a rape "joke". I could not imagine being a victim and seeing someone joke about such a horrific incident. They can't really be pulled off of nobody can give a proper explanation for why they're funny, an explanation that doesn't equate to the person thinking rape itself is a joke. With everything funny that could be said, relying on something like that as a basis for a joke is just lazy and says more to the type of person the "comedian" is than anything else.

ta·boo təˈbo͞o,taˈbo͞o/ adjective adjective: taboo; adjective: tabu 1. prohibited or restricted by social custom. Rape is not something that can be discussed by most people, whereas violence can be, which proves my point about rape being more taboo. Assault and rape are both forcing your will upon another. The only reason rape is more taboo is because there is no warped justification that people can use to get other people to overlook it. The fact is, assault can be just as - if not more - traumatizing than sexual assault. We joke about killing and beating others. Are you saying that doesn't trigger people who have been jumped or gone to war? Just because you feel strongly about rape doesn't mean that your rationale is correct.

If you're this sensitive on the internet you're going to have a bad time.

How exactly would that help his girlfriend?

Perhaps a heart to heart with her and her mom may help,

That's tough. There's nothing wrong with her, she's just very insecure. Either she'll get over it or feel EXTREMELY guilty /: Hopefully her opinion changes as you help her pick up her self esteem

I don't think its insecurity she's probably just nervous to kiss her husband in front of her parents. Maybe she does not do those things in front of them and it makes her nervous. Weddings can also wrack people nerves up extremely high and she might just be worrying about her big day. I do agree she might feel extremely guilty but I don't think this is a self esteem issue just a nervous thing.

tossaway2321 5

That's basically the definition of an insecurity

buttcramp 21

i agree with you #3 but keep in mind it's THEIR wedding. if they dont want to do the "kiss the bride" part they shouldnt have to. I'm sure stranger things at weddings have been done.

I think you guys are wrong, there IS something wrong with her, its not healthy to be that afraid of PDA. Will she never kiss her children in public or hold them if they cry and someone else is around? She needs help asap! This is of course assuming that shes not apart of any religion that forbids it, cause thats valid. But if shes just another red blooded American and is just afraid of it is crazy

Only logical solution is to become Jewish in the next few days and break the glass.

tiredteenager 16

As a Jew, I can say our weddings are awesome. But still, really? Not sure I like the connotation of being offered as an alternative to someone who may just need affirmation from her loved ones and understanding.

It was a joke that I did not intend to be offensive. I apologize sincerely, #23.

Apology accepted, #25. You were right about one thing, breaking the glass is really fun.

I break glasses wighout any weddings.

It is a sad world indeed when people have to apologise for making an innocent joke on a humour site. :-( **** off #16 and #23.

#53, did I stamp my foot and throw a tantrum? I said my piece and accepted the apology of the unintended remark. Not sure what else you're looking for, so I'm going to keep on *******, thanks.

You can always explain it to her Mom if you can't persuade her

Awe she is so sweet. There's nothing wrong with her, but if you both sincerely wish to kiss on your wedding day then you should get her help

Sweet? There IS something wrong with her; her anxiety is out of control. Get her some therapy.

need to work through that fast. start with small gestures and work up to kissing.

I hope you are being more considerate to her condition than you seem to be.

xninix_fml 36
Silver_89 9
xninix_fml 36

Yeah..sorry I should've gotten that.

#8 I hope you are being more considerate to OP than you seem to be too. My parents were like this too while they were married; my mum was reluctant to even hug/cuddle with him while me and my little brother were in the room. It was really awkward and strange and my dad told me afterwards it always bugged him and actually damaged his self-esteem. Consider the stereotypical guy who shows his love by fixing the car, painting the patio etc instead of buying her flowers which is what she would have preferred. When it comes to attraction, compatibility, showing affection everyone needs to be on the same page about what they need and want. If this is a serious issue for OP and his gf they should probably get some sort of help; depending on the circumstances guys in OP's situation are not immune from developing insecurities from stuff like this.

@35 Why is every comment you post a ******* essay? Try to sum things up in less words please.

It'll be a wedding full of awkward hi-fives

That may suck, but if you really love her (not saying you don't) then it really should only be awkward once.