By uggg - 23/01/2015 18:09 - United States - Seattle
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Just kiss her at the wedding. Don't give her the chance to panic. Remember, no answer means "yes."
#58 - Rape jokes are sensitive for most people because sexualized violence is more taboo than regular violence, which we're apparently desensitized to, considering the immense amount of people who continue to jokingly (and seriously) suggest assaulting other people in their comments. Personally, I think rape jokes can still be pulled off with a little finesse, but you're right, #9 dove into that one head first.
Rape jokes are sensitive for most people not because of any taboo, but because it's a devastating, despicable crime. There is no such thing as a rape "joke". I could not imagine being a victim and seeing someone joke about such a horrific incident. They can't really be pulled off of nobody can give a proper explanation for why they're funny, an explanation that doesn't equate to the person thinking rape itself is a joke. With everything funny that could be said, relying on something like that as a basis for a joke is just lazy and says more to the type of person the "comedian" is than anything else.
ta·boo təˈbo͞o,taˈbo͞o/ adjective adjective: taboo; adjective: tabu 1. prohibited or restricted by social custom. Rape is not something that can be discussed by most people, whereas violence can be, which proves my point about rape being more taboo. Assault and rape are both forcing your will upon another. The only reason rape is more taboo is because there is no warped justification that people can use to get other people to overlook it. The fact is, assault can be just as - if not more - traumatizing than sexual assault. We joke about killing and beating others. Are you saying that doesn't trigger people who have been jumped or gone to war? Just because you feel strongly about rape doesn't mean that your rationale is correct.
I don't think its insecurity she's probably just nervous to kiss her husband in front of her parents. Maybe she does not do those things in front of them and it makes her nervous. Weddings can also wrack people nerves up extremely high and she might just be worrying about her big day. I do agree she might feel extremely guilty but I don't think this is a self esteem issue just a nervous thing.
I think you guys are wrong, there IS something wrong with her, its not healthy to be that afraid of PDA. Will she never kiss her children in public or hold them if they cry and someone else is around? She needs help asap! This is of course assuming that shes not apart of any religion that forbids it, cause thats valid. But if shes just another red blooded American and is just afraid of it is crazy
#8 I hope you are being more considerate to OP than you seem to be too. My parents were like this too while they were married; my mum was reluctant to even hug/cuddle with him while me and my little brother were in the room. It was really awkward and strange and my dad told me afterwards it always bugged him and actually damaged his self-esteem. Consider the stereotypical guy who shows his love by fixing the car, painting the patio etc instead of buying her flowers which is what she would have preferred. When it comes to attraction, compatibility, showing affection everyone needs to be on the same page about what they need and want. If this is a serious issue for OP and his gf they should probably get some sort of help; depending on the circumstances guys in OP's situation are not immune from developing insecurities from stuff like this.
That's tough. There's nothing wrong with her, she's just very insecure. Either she'll get over it or feel EXTREMELY guilty /: Hopefully her opinion changes as you help her pick up her self esteem