Today, my fiancée texts me while out at a restaurant. She told me that she saw one of my high school friends there, and that he asked "How's Douglas doing?". She then asked me who Douglas is. Douglas is my legal name. We've been together for over three years and she didn't know. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML
Today, I've been seeing this girl for three months. After asking her if she'd like to go out to eat with me, I realized that she never called me by my name, just "hey you". While we were out, I wondered what she had me saved as, so I texted her when she got up to use the restroom. It was "free food". FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML
Today, my boyfriend was introducing me to some business partners. As he was going along telling me their names, when he introduced me, he called me by my best friend's name. FML
Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of four months. FML
Today, my fiancée’s siblings kept calling me by her ex-boyfriend’s name. FML
Today, I asked the girl I am in love with out on a date. She asked me for my name. FML
Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML
Today, I was introduced to the girl my current boyfriend went out with while dating me. FML
Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML
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Top comments
Miss_Jeannie 0
If she's been calling you "Doug" for short and didn't realize that your full name was Douglas, she's an idiot. If you were being called by some other name completely and never told her your real name was Douglas, YDI.
fatman1970 25
Why the hell haven't you told her your real name?
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Comments (71)
BigUmbrella 0
If you didn't TELL her what your name is, how do you expect her to KNOW what your name is?
kaengelangeleyes 9
Go **** yourself, mercyFML. :3
afulks78 11
Lol
Shokka23 0
Your fault buddy!! Lol
horseycrazah 2
I dated my boyfriend for almost a year when we were out and I heard him called by a completely different name. He swears up and down that he told me. I think I'd remember if he did.
sc3ptical 30
What the hell is wrong with you? DOUG is short for DOUGLAS. How his girlfriend couldn't figure that out is beyond me. FYL, OP.
Baller_Bob 17
Maybe she always called you Doug for short?
worldclassrager 41
Do you go by your middle name? That could give the issue
fantasyworld 39
Do you go by your middle name?
IvanTheWolfie98 10
I couldn't help but notice your post has a female symbol on it. I didn't know Douglas was a girls name too.