Today, my cousin thought it would be funny to make copies of my house keys and give it to random people on the street. I live alone and work a 12 hour shift daily. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I started a new job. I lost my work keys and had everyone running all over the building looking for them. We found them, hanging in the last lock I had used. They now all think I'm a nut. FML
Today, my coworker thought it would be funny to throw my keys up onto the top shelf in storage. I'm 4'10. FML
Today, late for work, I called my dad to see if he knew where my keys were. Turns out he'd taken them on holiday with him because they have a bottle opener on them. FML
Today, I came home after a long day at work to find the furniture in my living room had been rearranged by my mother-in-law. When asked how she got in, she told us she stole my husband's key and made herself a copy. She can now come here whenever she wants, unless I change the locks. FML
Today, my roommate asked me to lock the door as we left our place. I told her to use my keys, because my hands were full. Afterwards, she and her boyfriend set off out of town for the next couple of days. She forgot to give me back my keys. FML
Today, my sister couldn't find the spare key I gave her for my apartment, so I had to pay a $50 fee to the leasing office. Not 30 minutes after paying, she found the key. In her purse. On her keychain. FML
Today, I arrived to work at exactly 8 so I could leave at exactly 5, without overtime. I found out later that my brother took my keys with him somewhere and now I can't enter the house until he gets back at 11. FML
Today, I was over at a friend's place until very late. He had stolen my keys as a joke at some point, but by the time I noticed, he was too drunk to remember where he'd hidden them. FML
Today, after locking myself out of my house, I let myself into my car to wait on someone with a spare key. It took me 15 minutes to realise the house and car key share the same ring. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were wondering whose extra spare key was on the counter when we came home. Turns out it's his ex's and she returned it, while neither of us were home. We're still taking inventory to see what's missing. FML
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Top comments
Lehk 9
get a lock smith in there ASAP and never allow your cousin near your place again
Ambient25 24
Time to feed a wire from your doorknob to the electrical panel
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Comments (72)
imagineapc 11
Change your locks, maybe?
EvilUndead 9
Umm... I think you can use your cousin as a guard dog. Handcuff him within your apartment or something. That's probably illegal, though.
joljenni1717 4
Here's what you do: Call in sick, go to the hardware store and buy a new lock and key. Take the day and install it or get someone you know who is handy to install it. Buy a cheap camera and install it to see all those people who try to break in and can't....Watch the tape and laugh. Then show the tape to your cousin. While he's watching steal his key and make a copy. Karma.
angelitared 27
WTF is wrong with your cousin?
Bigfabthetruth52 22
First of all why does that bastard have access to your keys.i would **** his life up.
katttt21 20
You shouldn't have gave your cousin your keys in the first place. Change your locks ASAP.
rosey_5_3 2
Well it looks like it's time to get a new lock! Pronto!
ulquiorra102 10
Time to change the locks
D3ATHZ3RO 15
You know what they say, Payback is a beautiful thing
starlita_fml 15
wow, this isn't average stupidity! dafuq is wrong with him