By anony - 24/05/2016 12:57 - New Zealand - East Tamaki
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Common knowledge: The only one who can change a person is themselves. He'll choose what to do, regardless if you stay with him or not. Do what's best for you and I hope the best for him too.
That's definitely true too, sometimes people inspire others to change. It's how everyone grows to begin with, or so I think. So it's nice to be that person, but sometimes (In OP'S case) you have to let go and hope they find something else to inspire them or pull through it themselves.
His path in life shouldn't really be heavily weighed on you. You should be with him because you want to and it makes you happy. It should not be a responsibility of yours to mother him into a decent lifestyle. That's completely inconsiderate of his mom to put you in such a position.
If you're not wanting to leave him, then stay with him of course. But don't feel bad if the relationship isn't working out...just leave. If he's one of those I-can't-live-or-get-a-job-without-you-babe, then the relationship most likely won't last long, because you'll be playing the role of a mother rather than a girlfriend.
what about just check with him for like once a month I think it will help
Lol what is she? His caregiver? His mother? Guardian? I understand what you mean but it really should not be her responsibility. He needs to learn and figure out how to live and make good decisions as well as bounce back from the bad decisions on his own without full dependency of others around him. He needs to stand on his OWN two feet. If she wants to HELP him, it is 110% okay but it should not be a duty of hers to check up on him.