Today my boyfriend proposed to me and I gladly accepted. The first words out of his mouth after getting off his knees were, "I own you now!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by handing me a ring and saying, "Let's get this dumb shit over and done with." FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him by handing me a ring and telling me, "Okay we're engaged now." I should have seen it coming when we started dating, I went to his house one night and as I was leaving he said, "Okay you're my girlfriend now." FML
Today, my boyfriend of five days proposed to me at the mall. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by sending me a Bumper Sticker on Facebook that said "Bitch, let's get married". FML
Today, the guy I've been seeing for a little over a week proposed to me. FML
Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML
Today, after five years of dating, my boyfriend finally proposed to me. The words "just think of the tax breaks" were uttered. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML
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Top comments
Tripartita 45
Application of makeup will be regarded as an act of vandalism. Any attempts to back out of the engagement could result in legal prosecution for stealing yourself. If you upload any footage of yourself to the internet (YouTube, Snapchat, Vine, etc.), you could be convicted of digital piracy.
naivemisanthrope 4
If that was a joke, it was in very poor taste.
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Comments (51)
Scorpio1691 29
I think a take-back is in order for his response.
Arashikage 18
I think a take-back is in order for your response
scyth3s 13
I think a takeback is in order for both of your responses.
Jay18 22
I think the Seahawks should've just ran the ball
GlennGuagmire 20
He means he owns ur heart now and so that he owns u
RichardPencil 32
Uh-oh!!! Run away! Run away! Get the hell out of Dodge! Run, Forrest, run!
Tripartita 45
Application of makeup will be regarded as an act of vandalism. Any attempts to back out of the engagement could result in legal prosecution for stealing yourself. If you upload any footage of yourself to the internet (YouTube, Snapchat, Vine, etc.), you could be convicted of digital piracy.
RichardPencil 32
Sounds pretty toxic to me. I hope this isn't foreshadowing a dark future.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Or he was making a joke.
juuuliaaa_fml 28
Oh lighten up.
cuz803 46
In the Bible women are said to cook, clean, and please her husband. Maybe that's where he got it from
ellabellaboom 24
How about you not try to justify a possible negative situation by using religion.
HarleyBlues 24
I wish I could smack you
PikarooArtist 17
Get that sexist religious bullshit outta here!
BrotherPhil 35
Try League of Gentlemen instead of the Bible.
Tsukiyomi 16
Load of horseshit. That ain't anywhere in the bible
cuz803 46
It was an assumption jeez XP
naivemisanthrope 4
If that was a joke, it was in very poor taste.
TheAprilWitch 22
I hope he was trying to make a joke.
caseyface1123 15
I mean hopefully he meant it as a joke. Just pay attention to his behavior as you start planning and what not. Could be a sign of things to come.
vsus98 22
It sounds like a joke to me. He actually sounds like a pretty awesome guy. Good luck with your marriage OP!
yerawizardlizzy 27
How do you gather that he sounds like an awesome guy? We have no idea of his character except this statement from him.
Tripartita 45
It's an FML rule, Lizzy. Whenever somebody makes a stupid joke to an OP, somebody invariably talks about how how awesome they are. Conversely, if the OP is the one making the stupid joke, there will always be at least one comment about how they deserve the FML for saying something so inane.
vsus98 22
Oh. I'm sorry, I don't actually use this app often enough to realize I am a part of FML culture! However, I assumed he was making a joke, which I may be wrong, but he took a very serious moment that is a huge deal and he resorted to joking around. Once again, I am probably wrong and you should disregard anything I am saying.