Today, my boyfriend found out it makes a funny fart sound when he blows hard into my mouth in the middle of making out. I can't get him to stop doing it every time we kiss. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML
Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML
Today, my boyfriend discovered that I fart when I'm tickled enough. The best part was when he decided to show his family. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend discovered you can send sound clips as text messages. So far I've heard 5 of his farts in the past half hour. FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me and decided it'd be funny to blow raspberries in my crotch. He literally thought it was the funniest thing ever. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML
Today, my boyfriend's farts got so bad that we made a deal: every day that he doesn't fart, he gets a blowjob. Suddenly, he's not letting gas out anymore. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
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Top comments
carry_on 19
And who said romance is dead?
L2U7A_E5I9A2E8H 20
How old is your boyfriend?
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Comments (122)
Wiz_Of_Oz 17
Still a better love story than Twi- *slaps hand* bad Wiz.
rawme21 12
Try blowing hard into his nose, it makes a great sound and isn't very comfortable for the receiving person. I bet that'll make him stop ;)
More_Leg 14
Do it back! He'll either quit or you'll start enjoying it too! You can bond over bodily functions.
MuseFan1991 14
i dont get why people are getting so butthurt over this. i would just let him get it out of his system because the bigger the fuss you make, the more he'll do it. i find it hard to believe he's going to do this forever so i would just wait until the novelty wears off
Gingerette 8
True. It's like getting a new toy; after awhile, he'll break it in and continuous play is no longer necessary.
RedPillSucks 33
Meanwhile OP should suffer in silence? He's doing something that's extremely annoying to her. Why shouldn't she let him know? I see boys all the time act like total jerks to their girlfriends and the girl just sits there and takes it. SMH.
MuseFan1991 14
i wouldnt count winding her up as being a 'total jerk'. shes voiced her annoyance, and short of sounding whiney she should just sack up. it's not like he's doing anything horrific like eating his toenails or wiping bogeys on the walls. me and my other half do stuff like this all the time
Gingerette 8
Is it really that big of a deal? I've been in the exact same situation, and to be honest, it wasn't that bothersome. Just give him a break and try to be patient, OP. At least he isn't boring.
Neopopulas 9
Stop kissing him. He'll change his mind about how funny it is really quick.
worldclassrager 41
He should quit soon...just having some fun...or it's some weird way he is trying to Spice things up...
SkiPort 16
Just stop the kissing and everything, he'll learn fast. Very fast
subana 2
I had an ex who used to blow raspberries in my mouth while kissing. It was awful.
dawood_k 27
Do you whistle through your ass as well? Please don't down vote me now I'm just enquiring if the myth is true!