Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, but when I told him anal takes prep, like stretching and lubing, and you can’t just jam a knob up there like in a porno, he lost all interest, asked for a blowjob, and when I said no, he started sulking. I struggle to remember why I’m with him. FML
Today, in an attempt to spice things up a bit, my boyfriend and I discovered he takes it in the butt better than I do. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't like having sex with me, because I get too wet and it makes him go limp. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my live-in boyfriend after a long dry spell. It was passionate and great, until I hurt my back changing positions. Now he refuses to touch me, going as far as sleeping on the couch to give me "enough space". Hello new dry spell. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that I don't have a "grippy vagina" after he slipped out for the third time. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he gets more pleasure out of using a Q-tip than he does having sex with me. FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend told me he thought of new positions for us to try in bed because it was getting boring. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
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Top comments
ccsmilvr 0
Wow that does suck, but why would you let him do that in the first place ??
mrbattleman 10
maybe ear sex? once you go black, you go deaf
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Comments (337)
weezz3675 0
Whenever you decide to break up with him........call me ;-)
julia_lynn 21
God damn you FML, for giving my boyfriend new ideas. XD
fakkumairaifu 14
Unless this is your thing, you should get rid of him. And watch your nostrils. Hope you're a light sleeper.
IanCosentino 0
Holy shit ****! xD listen that really sucks but you have to admit. That's pretty damn funny.
dpulley 0
Boring...I never get bored of the vajayjay lol Hes just a lil kinky, let the man have his fun. As long as he lets u have yours :)
Schlesselman 8
0mggg im laughing so hard! i'm sorry for you!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
aPieceOfFruit 16
Search google for the most obscure fetish you can find and force him to take part....
conniejoy529 10
if you don't want to do it just say no, simple as that. he should respect that and you should respect yourself by not doing things that you don't want to do simply to satisfy him. I guess the best question would be how willing is he to try things because it would make you happy?
nooneknowskay 7
I had a boyfriend who used my feet... And warming lube... Never again...
eatpraylovee44 0
That's discussing. At least he's honest, but what a pig. ;p