Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, but when I told him anal takes prep, like stretching and lubing, and you can’t just jam a knob up there like in a porno, he lost all interest, asked for a blowjob, and when I said no, he started sulking. I struggle to remember why I’m with him. FML
Today, in an attempt to spice things up a bit, my boyfriend and I discovered he takes it in the butt better than I do. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't like having sex with me, because I get too wet and it makes him go limp. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my live-in boyfriend after a long dry spell. It was passionate and great, until I hurt my back changing positions. Now he refuses to touch me, going as far as sleeping on the couch to give me "enough space". Hello new dry spell. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that I don't have a "grippy vagina" after he slipped out for the third time. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he gets more pleasure out of using a Q-tip than he does having sex with me. FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend told me he thought of new positions for us to try in bed because it was getting boring. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
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Top comments
ccsmilvr 0
Wow that does suck, but why would you let him do that in the first place ??
mrbattleman 10
maybe ear sex? once you go black, you go deaf
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Comments (337)
bubo_fml 10
Heat things up...Swap out the lube with Jalepeno juice!!
bubo_fml 10
If he'd bone your armpit, have you considered where/what else he's stuck his dick into? Animal, mineral or vegetable?
abbyhoneywaffles 11
YOU LET HIM **** YOU IN THE ARMPIT?!?!?!
kaykay20 0
Well you could try out other vaginal, anal, and oral sex positions at least then it would feel good for both of you. Theirs a lot of different ones you couldn't possibly done them all or have you 0_0
awechen 1
Maybe time to break up...
antonia10 6
That is ridiculous and unsanitary. You seriously need to talk to him because if he can't appreciate what you are giving him, then you are better off with out him
angrynegro7 16
Hope you don't have any piercings, Op! Next thing you know he'll be asking you to gauge them out!
woopdattrick 5
Wouldn't the stubbles hurt?!
agary3 0
try someone that wouldn't get bored
meggybee 4
Uhhh that's really strange why would you let him??