Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the...

By katie - 23/08/2019 06:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 704

You deserved it 3 826

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Same thing different taste

Mr Floppy

By rachiej8 - 10/06/2012 04:13 - United States - Fairlee

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said, "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 974

You deserved it 5 500

Yummy

By Anonymous - 22/01/2024 20:00 - Germany

Today, my boyfriend brought home some expensive ice cream and we licked it off of each other. It was fun until we learned that dried ice cream on skin smells almost exactly like puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 187

You deserved it 256

New one

By Anonymous - 07/02/2020 12:00 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I closed my eyes while my boyfriend was fingering me, and I felt a cold liquid inside me. I opened my eyes, and he was pouring yogurt into me. He said “I wanted to try something new.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 430

You deserved it 454

Bernie

By Anonymous - 27/11/2017 06:00

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. It would have been great, if a mate of his didn't tell him to put Listerine strips in his mouth first "for the tingle." I've been running cold water over my burning genitals for 15 minutes while he laughs at the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 942

You deserved it 613

Saucy

By ouchhhh - 20/07/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try something new in bed. He blindfolded me and I felt something cold on my lady parts. 5 seconds later it started burning so I looked. He decided to use toothpaste because he couldn't find chocolate sauce to lick off. It hurts to pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 544

You deserved it 618

By flavored - 18/11/2013 15:26 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 203

You deserved it 19 441

Nearly there

By baby_trex_arms - 05/05/2015 15:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to play the hot and cold game with my boyfriend until he found my clitoris. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 441

You deserved it 5 712

Do not attempt this at home

By Anonymous - 01/04/2014 02:08 - United States - Santa Barbara

Today, my husband and I had some bath time to ourselves. After having sex, he decided to put bath salts in my vagina to spice things up for the next round. It's been twenty minutes out of the bath and it still feels like there are pop rocks in my vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 725

You deserved it 37 181

By Anonymous - 10/03/2012 07:23 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 037

You deserved it 59 274

By C0r1nn3 - 07/06/2012 04:02 - United States - Santa Clara

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 798

You deserved it 5 065

MidnaLink 33

Friday 23 August 2019 6:03

And what, pray tell, was this stupidity going to accomplish?

lizenhagen 11

Friday 23 August 2019 6:11

why wouldnt you just take a hot bath?

Comments

Chantalle Hensgens-Waltmans 19

Friday 23 August 2019 16:46

Next time, just light a candle and hold iT under the ice cubes 👌🏻

RichardPencil 30

Friday 23 August 2019 18:05

You have a brain down there? That explains a lot!

BurnInDemonFire 33

Saturday 24 August 2019 2:11

Goddammit... why do women keep listening to Gwyneth Paltrow when she tells them to shove random things in their vaginas? Remember, she had Chris Martin in hers, so she's not the best person to listen to.

Sam Siggers 8

Saturday 24 August 2019 6:06

sounds like your boyfriend needs some sex lessons. perhaps next timenyou guys do that or something along those lines to put on a **** video that does that and follow them? if it doesnt feel good or right, he is doing something wrong.

Nhayaa 21

Saturday 24 August 2019 6:38

But... WHY? I'm so tired of human stupidity... 😧

merican_redneck4 11

Saturday 24 August 2019 18:40

The only way that should ever be done if you want that cold sensation have the boyfriend husband or what ever hold a ice cube in their mouth then have them go down on you