Animals, Transportation and School: Today, my bike slipped on ice and I slid spectacularly for several...

By SmellyLeg - 20/11/2017 15:00

Today, my bike slipped on ice and I slid spectacularly for several meters. While my helmet saved me from a cracked skull, nothing could protect me from landing leg-first in the dog poop somebody hadn't bothered to pick up. I had to go to school like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 325

You deserved it 323

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 19/02/2015 16:06 - United Kingdom - Leicester

Today, whilst walking to a primary school to give pupils a lesson on cleanliness, I tripped and landed on a dog turd. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 748

You deserved it 3 269

Nature is harsh

By fallsdownplenty45 - 02/06/2009 11:08 - Taiwan

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 933

You deserved it 6 759

By Anonymous - 19/01/2010 09:34 - United States

Today, as I was walking home, I felt my feet slip out from under me and I face-planted in the slushy, dirty, melting snow. I rolled over, completely soaked, and attempted to get up, thinking no one saw me. A mail-man then passed me without offering to help, and said, "I've seen worse." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 402

You deserved it 3 040

Stay at home weather

By Anonymous - 24/01/2024 12:00 - Germany

Today, I slipped and fell on a sudden patch of ice, on a road that had been completely fine until then, so I decided to push my bike past the icy patch before getting back on. Little did I know, the ice continued for the entire rest of the road, which was another 3km. FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 122

By cathugger - 13/07/2019 16:30

Today, while hurrying by bike to an appointment, my chain broke. I quickly got off the road and managed to fix it on the sidewalk, covering my hands in black smear. Dirty but confident about my repair skills, I got up. A second later, felt something warm running down my neck. Bird poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 928

You deserved it 130

Slippin' and a slidin'

By Imnotfromhere - 05/03/2022 04:00

Today, my dog decided to take a poop at the top of an icy hill. Being a good citizen, I went to clean it up. Guess who slipped and wore the poop all the way down the hill… FML

I agree, your life sucks 906

You deserved it 136

The hero

By POP101 - 05/02/2010 21:27 - Canada

Today, there was a girl in heels running in front of me at school, and she slipped on ice. Trying to be a hero, I dropped my backpack and ran up to help her, but ended up slipping and landing on her leg. As I walked back to my backpack, I found out I'd dropped my laptop and broken it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 241

You deserved it 15 010

Like an animal

By limeychefboy - 23/02/2018 01:30

Today, I was on my motorbike 200km from home, in the middle of nowhere, when I needed to poop, so I found a wooded area and did my thing. As I was climbing back up, I knocked my helmet from its perch and watched it roll right into what I’d just left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 731

You deserved it 2 269

By anonymous - 20/02/2015 23:49 - United States - Paragould

Today, it was snowing but I had to let my dog out, so I picked him up and carried him outside. I slipped, landed on him and ended up breaking his leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 488

You deserved it 7 111

By Icy - 27/12/2009 08:43 - United States

Today, I was walking to the bus stop. I saw a chunk of ice and attempted to kick it. Sadly it was frozen to the ground, so I fell, broke my toe, and missed the bus. Even the bus driver was laughing as he drove by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 667

You deserved it 29 985

Dave_Davington 33

Monday 20 November 2017 15:56

This of course raises a very important question. Is this a shitty situation or a slippery situation?

Akitakat 31

Thursday 16 November 2017 15:26

Seriously, glad you were not injured. That leg could of easily landed wrong & broke. Actually, you can say that the shit broke your fall. Lucky you! :O)

Comments

Akitakat 31

Wednesday 15 November 2017 15:14

Shit... it happens.

Akitakat 31

Thursday 16 November 2017 15:26

Seriously, glad you were not injured. That leg could of easily landed wrong & broke. Actually, you can say that the shit broke your fall. Lucky you! :O)

exileonmainst 16

Monday 20 November 2017 15:14

Oh man, that’s ruff. I guess you’re a bit melan-collie-c after that fall.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 20 November 2017 15:48

Sounds like a... Wait on it... Shih Tzu situation!

Dave_Davington 33

Monday 20 November 2017 15:56

This of course raises a very important question. Is this a shitty situation or a slippery situation?

RichardPencil 30

Monday 20 November 2017 16:46

Uh-oh. Around here, the phrase “shitty situation” is about as acceptable as the n-word. Prepare to get reamed.

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Monday 20 November 2017 18:49

Yes.

mattyiscool123 26

Tuesday 21 November 2017 15:11

Shippery situation

Dave_Davington 33

Wednesday 22 November 2017 13:35

Or perhaps a slitty situation? Then again, that sounds like it could mean something different.

Conner Dalbeck 15

Wednesday 22 November 2017 20:31

why not both *Mexican music plays*

Lobby_Bee 17

Monday 20 November 2017 16:23

In the event of ice and snow, please equip your bicycle with studded tires.

arioch_fml 20

Monday 20 November 2017 17:09

Ouch, at least you have a way to break the ice with new people, assuming anyone will go near you.

TeachAllTheMath 19

Tuesday 21 November 2017 1:12

Time to do a bathroom scrub down!

sweetbliss3 37

Tuesday 21 November 2017 3:33

why not take a few extra minutes to go home and change. I'm sure everyone would like to not smell shit all day long.

sambmjmdjj 9

Tuesday 21 November 2017 11:56

Some things just are not taught in school.

chocolatejunebug 9

Tuesday 21 November 2017 4:20

Ohh, it got posted! I'm the op. To answer why I didn't go home and change - I only noticed when I had gotten to school and got out tissues to clean up some scratches with.... And by then, a certain level of wooziness didn't make biking home attractive at all. I got lucky though, since my fiance was visiting and brought me a change of clothes the next break. Still, I spent 90 minutes smelling of definitely-not-roses... Ah well. I wasn't injured badly and I learned to be a lot more careful in the winter, it could have been a lot worse. Your puns are awesome, btw. I love puns, so...