Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Meat is murder
Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML
RIP
Today, while I was staying at a farm for a few nights, I got really connected to a chicken I met. It was so tame and really cuddly. I legit loved it so much. Later on, we had chicken for dinner. It was the same chicken. He also had a name. FML
Out on the town
Today, I was busy working on a paper, so my parents offered to go get me some Mexican food. Eager for some nachos, I thanked them. At 9 p.m. they weren't back, so I called. They weren't in an accident, but spontaneously buying a new car without telling me. They didn't return until 11 p.m. with cold, greasy KFC. FML
Nutrition expert over here
Today, as I fed my dog his dinner of chicken offal, a drumstick, a wing, a mackerel, and a raw egg, my dad bitched and moaned that I waste money feeding him meat instead of just buying the cheapest kibble at the store. FML
Urges
Today, I accidentally bought chicken fingers. I couldn't even make it two days as a vegetarian. FML
Today, I found out my dad ate my pet rabbit two years ago. He said he ran away. FML
Storage wars
Today, I went without my phone all day, because my roommate moved it. Because I'd left it in the fridge. On top of a bucket of KFC. Which he ate. FML
Today, I was sick with the flu so my boyfriend announced that he would make me some chicken soup. It was touching until I stumbled to the kitchen and found out that his "chicken soup" was actually leftover KFC bones boiled in water. FML
Today, I bought a dog to make me feel less lonely. He ran away. FML
Today, my husband gave our three-year-old son a lesson on life and death. He did this by slaughtering our pet chicken for dinner in front of him. My son has been crying for hours. FML
Top comments
Porschephile 0
Your dad has a sense of humor
BooGhosted 0
Get fries.
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Comments (196)
cherryleaf23 7
Wow, this one made me kinda sad. I have pet chickens too, (who I love dearly) and I understand how you feel about your pet chicken running away. I would be so sad if something happened to mine. I'm sorry. I really hope you can find her/him. I'm sorry. ='(
atari83man 0
I work at kfc!
thekewlest69 9
What a great dad
beonka255 0
Hahahaha, I'm so sorry I'm laughing but that dad of yours has a great sense of humor lol
xkristinannx 0
Maybe your dads trying to tell you something...
whitey317 0
I love kfc
melzsuck 2
I would hate your dad...My pet chicken paris died, and I hate KFC ...everyone doesn't get it
Lady_Bee_fml 13
I officially love anyone who can say 'my beloved pet chicken'.
rainysky 8
Dude. You shouldn't have a pet chicken, get a puppy.
bgraber04 1
kinda weird to have a pet chicken...just sayin