Work: Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender.... - FML

By Bob smith - 19/12/2011 20:57 - Australia

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 878

You deserved it 33 543

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Same thing different taste

By bitch - 07/10/2013 07:37 - Australia

Today, I was working behind the bar at a club. After serving drinks to a guy, he asked me if I could carry them outside to the two girls waiting for him. I scowled at him and told him I wasn't a waitress. That's when I realised he had one arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 527

You deserved it 56 607

By Sovekipisse - 15/06/2013 22:24 - France - Arthon-en-retz

Today, I went to a bar for some drinks. A guy looked me up and down, gave me a suggestive smile, then asked for my name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 546

You deserved it 4 183

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 00:31 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 187

You deserved it 21 603

By poorclubgoer - 14/11/2009 10:11 - United States

Today, I decided to go to a club with my friends. I was flattered when an attractive guy started dancing with me. Later, I went to grab my money to pay for my dinner and realized while dancing, the very sneaky man pulled my forty dollars out of my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 690

You deserved it 5 919

By Tyler - 19/11/2011 07:58 - United States

Today, at my job as a cocktail server in a bar, a group of good looking ladies sat in my section. As I was finishing up with the table next to them I overheard one of them saying, "I hope we don't get that guy, I want a sexy waiter tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 785

You deserved it 3 083

This Charming Man

By Anonymous - 01/03/2020 18:00

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad. It didn't go well since unfortunately he’s the guy I had to remove from the club I’m the bouncer at, and had to report to the police for getting drunk, stroking himself over his pants and taking photos in the ladies toilets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 944

You deserved it 108

Don't even try

By divingconfidence - 22/12/2012 11:21 - United States - Maple Grove

Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 713

You deserved it 4 786

Gottem

By Anonymous - 04/05/2014 21:07 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 759

You deserved it 6 716

By Anonymous - 16/10/2012 04:48 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, a one-eyed drunken homeless man followed me around the store I work at, screaming at me because I turned down his sexual advances. My managers and coworkers wouldn't kick him out because they thought it was funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 693

You deserved it 2 106

By be_nj - 29/05/2009 03:51 - United States

Today, at work as a cashier, I had a male customer come up to me and ask me what hours I worked today, like he has done for several weeks now. Immediately after, my manager calls my lane to tell me to watch out for that guy. He has been stalking a co-worker of mine. Apparently, I'm next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 534

You deserved it 4 172

Next

Top comments

zoPwNAgEzo 21

Tuesday 20 December 2011 0:51

Damn those perverted coat stands!

upyourzlolz 11

Tuesday 20 December 2011 0:55

Well, that guy is in for a... One night stand.

Comments

pickles2b2 4

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:11

Ok, I have to admit I lol'd at that one.

islander03 5

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:15

sneaking drinks again?

loveanthony645 5

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:25

You sir, have failed.

hateevryone 14

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:29

hahaha don't drink on the job

Lando_93 1

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:37

Your not supposed to drink on the job ya know.

PeteTony 0

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:40

Coat stand gonna get ya haha

gogo451 0

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:55

Lmao!!!

grasshopper02 2

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:59

Less meth before work would be good. Don't see this as a fml though..

Daydreemdie 0

Tuesday 20 December 2011 5:10

Um... Durp? O_o

save_da_whales 0

Tuesday 20 December 2011 5:10

Maybe you should get your eyes checked dude

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The Top

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 43 887

You deserved it 4 690

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You deserved it 1 572

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I agree, your life sucks 11 878

You deserved it 44 892

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the phone to make a call and had heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 707

You deserved it 78 242