Work: Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender....

By Bob smith - 19/12/2011 20:57 - Australia

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 878

You deserved it 33 543

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Same thing different taste

By bitch - 07/10/2013 07:37 - Australia

Today, I was working behind the bar at a club. After serving drinks to a guy, he asked me if I could carry them outside to the two girls waiting for him. I scowled at him and told him I wasn't a waitress. That's when I realised he had one arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 527

You deserved it 56 607

By Sovekipisse - 15/06/2013 22:24 - France - Arthon-en-retz

Today, I went to a bar for some drinks. A guy looked me up and down, gave me a suggestive smile, then asked for my name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 546

You deserved it 4 183

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 00:31 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 187

You deserved it 21 603

By poorclubgoer - 14/11/2009 10:11 - United States

Today, I decided to go to a club with my friends. I was flattered when an attractive guy started dancing with me. Later, I went to grab my money to pay for my dinner and realized while dancing, the very sneaky man pulled my forty dollars out of my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 690

You deserved it 5 919

By Tyler - 19/11/2011 07:58 - United States

Today, at my job as a cocktail server in a bar, a group of good looking ladies sat in my section. As I was finishing up with the table next to them I overheard one of them saying, "I hope we don't get that guy, I want a sexy waiter tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 785

You deserved it 3 083

This Charming Man

By Anonymous - 01/03/2020 18:00

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad. It didn't go well since unfortunately he’s the guy I had to remove from the club I’m the bouncer at, and had to report to the police for getting drunk, stroking himself over his pants and taking photos in the ladies toilets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 944

You deserved it 108

Don't even try

By divingconfidence - 22/12/2012 11:21 - United States - Maple Grove

Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 713

You deserved it 4 786

Gottem

By Anonymous - 04/05/2014 21:07 - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 759

You deserved it 6 716

By Anonymous - 16/10/2012 04:48 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, a one-eyed drunken homeless man followed me around the store I work at, screaming at me because I turned down his sexual advances. My managers and coworkers wouldn't kick him out because they thought it was funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 693

You deserved it 2 106

By be_nj - 29/05/2009 03:51 - United States

Today, at work as a cashier, I had a male customer come up to me and ask me what hours I worked today, like he has done for several weeks now. Immediately after, my manager calls my lane to tell me to watch out for that guy. He has been stalking a co-worker of mine. Apparently, I'm next. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 534

You deserved it 4 172

zoPwNAgEzo 21

Tuesday 20 December 2011 0:51

Damn those perverted coat stands!

upyourzlolz 11

Tuesday 20 December 2011 0:55

Well, that guy is in for a... One night stand.

Comments

CoolGuyJones 4

Tuesday 20 December 2011 3:21

You've gone off the deep end ma'friend...

Omega_Mus 7

Tuesday 20 December 2011 3:28

Watch out for that hat stand...it's looking shady with that fedora on.

vbmg152 18

Tuesday 20 December 2011 3:28

Bet you felt dumb!!!

FMLsAreFun27 0

Tuesday 20 December 2011 3:42

Pedocoatstand. Pedobear's side kick.

butterz1839 3

Tuesday 20 December 2011 3:48

I thought it might be mike the sitch

brittk23 0

Tuesday 20 December 2011 3:51

Awww at least you were just lookin out :) haha

nelsokev 6

Tuesday 20 December 2011 3:57

That's what happens when you rat people out.

bretty_boieeeeyy 0

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:00

Beware the guy hiding in the coat stand

cdypoore 0

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:06

Don't you know that you're not supposed to drink on the job?

mccutie936 6

Tuesday 20 December 2011 4:09

Better watch out

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You deserved it 3 629

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Today, in my psychology class, we were given a sheet that had a list of stressful events and we were to select the ones we had experienced in the last 12 months. I got highest in my class of above an 80% chance of getting a life threatening illness due to stress. Everyone laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 414

You deserved it 3 211

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I agree, your life sucks 31 602

You deserved it 3 888

Today, I found a wallet belonging to some guy, it had $355 inside. Because he had his address written inside, I decided to return it hoping for a reward. I drove for 40 mins and finally got to his house during peak hour. All he did was say "oh cool". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 640

You deserved it 15 072

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I agree, your life sucks 36 681

You deserved it 5 679

Today, I got my wisdom teeth pulled. My usually detached and unromantic boyfriend rushed right over after work with flowers and movies. A little while later, he admitted excitedly that he'd heard the numbing medication also works on gag reflexes and wanted to test the theory. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 491

You deserved it 7 041

Today, I was working at the theater as an Usher. A man comes up to me and gives me his ticket. At the same time, he takes a sip of water and suddenly felt the need to sneeze. The water came out from his nose and landed all over my face. I was covered with his mucus and had to wish him a good movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 948

You deserved it 2 672

Same thing different taste

This Charming Man

Don't even try

Gottem

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