Chakkamofo
United States
Today, it's my birthday. My wife gave me a card that read, "You made it to 36!" It's my 35th birthday. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
divorced
United States
Today, my wife put divorce papers in my birthday card. FML
Anonymous
How can I make this about me?
Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML
you would
United States
Today, my wife told me that she wanted a divorce. It is also my 39th birthday today. For my birthday present, she gave me a subscription to match.com. FML
Not a day over 35
Anchorage, United States
It's the thought that counts
Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML
Anonymous
United States
It's all too much
Today, it's my birthday. My gifts were a stomach bug from my kid and a confession to a year-long affair from my (now soon-to-be-ex) husband of 21 years. Nobody even got me a card. FML
Anonymous
San Francisco, United States
Today, it's my 30th birthday. My husband came home with a big case of beer for himself, then told me he didn't have time to get me a present because of work. FML
Anonymous
Lafayette, United States
Short Queen
Today, it's my 36th birthday. My boyfriend and I celebrated with a big group of our friends, our families, and their kids. Everyone there was taller than me, including my friend's 10 year-old son. FML
Anonymous
Netherlands
Today, my husband and kids celebrated my 50th birthday. I turned 47. FML
Gabrielguitar
United States
Thanks, I guess…
Today, it was my birthday and everyone in the office chipped in to buy me a card, and nothing but a card. It had a pre-written message on it and a space to write "Love, *insert name*" where everyone signed their names. The "Love" was crossed out and replaced with "From". FML
salt.
United States
Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom." That's how he put it, anyway. FML
Top comments
billybob12345 0
Really? Thats a problem? The only people I know who care about shit like that are 12 year old girls. Grow a pair.
Chakkamofo 0
@darkhelmet: You are wise. I owe you a beer.
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Comments (28)
GiddyXD 0
guess i will be 14tg i think??
lelanatty 0
fml must not have been as popular back then. anyway, how's this for role reversal?
starberries 0
Big ******* deal. I have to stop and think about how old I am sometimes. If this is one of the worst things in your life, you're pretty lucky.
MeganCello 8
Haha, my birthday is on Thursday. I'm going to be 14 and for the past 2 years no one has remembered my birthday. Be grateful she remembered.
verysam123 0
wow like no duhh she is joking
birdfreak 24
I would have said "Now you can't say I forgot next year!"
threeminutesfrom 0
Calm down puss one year and it's not like it's a buff deal
effyoubitch 5
At least she remembered it was your birthday!
AmberLove1515 0
not cool
Timnuktu 0
If they had bad handwriting, I could see the 5 in 35 look like a 6.