Today, it's my birthday. After a day out partying, I came home to find all my stuff smashed in the yard, even my 42" plasma TV. After asking my girlfriend what her problem was, she said a "slut" left a message on the machine stating how fun last night was. It turned out to be my mom. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to treat me out to dinner and cake for my birthday. My mom felt left out and yelled at my girlfriend in an angry tirade. My girlfriend went home. I'm spending my birthday, alone in my room. FML
Today, my mom was screaming and throwing things at me and I didn’t know why. Then I checked the date. Her birthday was yesterday. FML
Today, I threw a party. My drunk boyfriend decided to bring my 50-inch flatscreen TV downstairs from our bedroom. The TV didn't make it. FML
Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend at her mom's birthday party, in front of her whole family. They even got it on video. FML
Today, I got a laptop for my birthday. I was thrilled until I realized that my mom had given away my old one without asking. 6 years of games, music, and pictures down the drain. FML
Today, my mom screamed at me to the point of tears, because it rained on her birthday. FML
Today, I threw a party at my girlfriend's house before her parents came home from vacation. After the party, I found all of her mom's favorite wine glasses broken. I spent $500 on new glasses, and wrote a huge apology for the party and the damage. She got home and told me that they were already broken. FML
Today, I was taking a nap while my mom was at work. I woke up when she came home and didn't think anything of it so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, I went downstairs and our 52" plasma screen TV, my xbox 360, and $1500 computer were all stolen. I'm guessing that wasn't my mom. FML
Today, my parents and I went to the movies for my mom's birthday. After the movie, my mom and dad got into a fight, and left me at the movies. My cell phone was dead, and my house was about 12 miles away. They finally came and picked me up, hours later. FML
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Top comments
simplyabsurd 0
I suggest ditching the psycho. A 42" plasma? I certainly hope she's going to buy you a new one. But my guess is she doesn't even have a job. Just because it has legs and talks doesn't mean it's worth dating.
deaditegirl 0
Well, now maybe you can get a girlfriend who is slightly less crazy...
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Comments (376)
DeathBoy 0
Another vote for calling the cops / bringing a law suit and restraining order. That kind of behaviour shouldn't be tolerated - and can get worse. Keep safe!
swagmonkey 0
WTF? Your girlfriend is such a bitch. First of all, she wouldn't have had the right to do that even if you had cheated on her, and you could sue her for the damages even in that case. Second, your mom OBVIOUSLY didn't say anything that specified sleeping with you. There are lots of other ways to "have a good time" with a person that don't involve cheating. Even if she didn't recognize your mom's voice (which, contrary to popular opinion, I think is quite reasonable), she should have confronted/asked you about it in person before doing something so irreversible. Had she done that, you would have told her it was your mother, and she would have been embarrassed for having thought it was something so different, but no real harm would be done. You could laugh about it later, and have crazy make-up sex. :-p Given her current choice, though, you absolutely need to dump her. Make her pay for what she destroyed, and sue her if she refuses.
nina_fml 0
Holy crap. I hope you dumped her. What else will she destroy on a whim? Sounds dangerous.
Froppo 0
kill her with fire! and anyone who put YDI should also be killed with fire.
jbentleybass 0
I'd make her pay every cent, and then make her leave. She sounds dangerous.
Rawrrr14 0
Whoa. I hate when girlfriends start like freaking out. I mean really. Have some pride girls, don't just start running your mouth and breaking things. She's in deep shit now, I hope she pays for everything, even if she doesn't have a job she needs to get the money. On the other hand, why didn't you take her? I mean I can understand, maybe guys night out? At the same time I bet a guy somewhere in the world has cheated on his girl, and had the other girl leave a message, and said "oh no no no baby, that was my uhh.... mom!" Not saying the OP did that, but maybe the girl has some other relationship problems in the past? But by no means does it give her the right to destroy anyone's things. I hope everything turns out okay OP!
Vagrarian 2
Get her to pay for what she destroyed. I would say you could even talk to the police, as what she did could be considered a crime. Threaten her with lawsuits and/or arrest if she doesn't pay up, and be true to your word. And naturally, dump her. She's a psycho.
Tehalon 0
Women... /sigh Tis that they can give us babies and they got boobs, but else.... the world could be a better place without em. (just kidding just kidding, stop throwing shoes at my face.)
Zeegloo 0
Dump your crazy girlfriend after you make her pay for your shit!
sailing 0
Destruction of Property...I'd find a good attorney, and then drop her ass.