Love: Today, it's my 30th birthday. My husband came home with a big...

By Anonymous - 19/11/2015 14:52 - United States - San Francisco

Today, it's my 30th birthday. My husband came home with a big case of beer for himself, then told me he didn't have time to get me a present because of work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 657

You deserved it 2 027

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Same thing different taste

Happy anniversary!

By Anonymous - 10/10/2019 14:00 - United States

Today, it's my husband's and my first wedding anniversary. I came home from work hoping for at least a bouquet of flowers, only to find my husband passed out on the couch, with a few beer cans next to him. I guess I missed the party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 782

You deserved it 226

Kinda sus

By Unwanted - 21/10/2023 22:00

Today, it's my birthday. My husband said he had to work today and “rain checked” my birthday celebration for “god knows when, because I’m so busy. I’ll let you know.” A couple of months ago it was his female work bestie’s birthday and he got her a cake, balloon, flowers, and requested time off to take her out for lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 139

You deserved it 154

By Birthday blues - 13/12/2018 22:00

Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 034

You deserved it 600

By horribleday - 20/06/2017 09:00 - United States - Ozark

Today, my husband stood me up for his birthday dinner, that I'd made, in our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 720

You deserved it 423

By Anonymous - 07/05/2013 12:48 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, it's my birthday. I worked late, so I was looking forward to spending a quiet evening with my husband. When he suggested we go grocery shopping, I got excited thinking he had organized a surprise party or something. He actually just took me grocery shopping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 172

You deserved it 9 687

By Anonymous - 24/06/2011 23:36 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend told me he was too busy studying for finals, but that he'd take me out another day instead. He later drunk-dialled me from a party demanding a lift back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 134

You deserved it 4 243

Inappropriate crush

By Anonymous - 14/06/2020 17:00

Today, a week after my 10-year anniversary, I realized I've somehow been roped into hosting my husband's crush's birthday party with all their friends. My gift to myself was a $60 bottle of whiskey that won't arrive in time to help me with my debilitating social anxiety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 454

You deserved it 358

By HLRJ - 29/08/2018 09:00 - United States - Concord

Today, after my husband said he forgot our anniversary 2 days ago because he was so focused on planning for today, he forgot what was so important about today. It's my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 143

You deserved it 254

By nocakeforyou! - 15/03/2011 13:11

Today, I came home to my drunk husband, to find that he raided our fridge and freezer to soothe his beer munchies. That would have been fine, had he not eaten the top tier of our wedding cake I'd been saving to eat on our first wedding anniversary, which is in 4 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 212

You deserved it 14 071

It's all too much

By Anonymous - 23/06/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My gifts were a stomach bug from my kid and a confession to a year-long affair from my (now soon-to-be-ex) husband of 21 years. Nobody even got me a card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 638

You deserved it 99

Tripartita 44

Friday 20 November 2015 1:35

Oh, yeah, when I was employed as a Selfish Prick, it made gift giving extremely difficult. The pay wasn't even that good.

Psycocharger 19

Friday 20 November 2015 1:28

So rude of him!!! You should hide his beer for revenge >:)

Comments

worldclassrager 39

Friday 20 November 2015 4:07

Time for a drink but no time for you? A bit selfish

Siehnados 17

Friday 20 November 2015 4:36

Sounds like you picked a winner...

igg125 30

Friday 20 November 2015 4:36

Happy birthday

flopstar 21

Friday 20 November 2015 4:56

Happy birthday go out with some friends & hopefully tomorrow he will make it up to you (: I'm sorry about that though

moodyreallyrocks 27

Friday 20 November 2015 4:58

Happy Birthday OP! Don't let it ruin your big day, go out and have fun!!

WreckeRalph36 18

Friday 20 November 2015 4:59

Divorce ?

AScooterman 12

Friday 20 November 2015 5:17

Next time he's asking for sex you should tell him that your pussy doesn't have time it's cat napping

creepyclowntown 10

Friday 20 November 2015 5:20

sounds like a friend of mine's husband.she wouldn't be able to just leave though because she has kids.fyl

katiepda 11

Friday 20 November 2015 5:47

sounds like my husband.

ko051598 20

Friday 20 November 2015 6:02

You should of asked him for the beer then ?

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The Top

Today, I accidentally fell asleep at work after working a 12-hour shift. Instead of waking me up, my coworkers spiked my coffee mug with whiskey and told my boss I was drunk. My boss wouldn't even listen to my side of the story and fired me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 705

You deserved it 2 991

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to mess around at my workplace's parking lot. Things got hot and steamy, but in the middle of it all, there came a bang at my car window. My frantic boss had seen us and thought I was being attacked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 060

You deserved it 28 829

The Top

Today, my girlfriend broke my Xbox while I was playing Warzone. She said she heard me playing with another girl, and accused me of cheating. It was just the A.I. saying, "Copy, I’m on it." Anyone selling an Xbox One? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 981

You deserved it 257

Today, I showed my daughter video footage from a security camera that showed her using her employee key to enter the store I own, disarming the alarm, and stealing several very valuable items. Her defense? That someone had "photoshopped" the video. We'll see how that goes down in court. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 270

You deserved it 2 909

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 042

You deserved it 5 237

Today, I'm so lonely that I get happy when I get attention from car drivers when they honk at me for driving too slowly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 693

You deserved it 247

Today, I finally got the guts to walk out of class 30 minutes early, only to find that the back door was locked. As I stood there like an idiot trying to get it open, all 200 people in my class turned to laugh. My professor stared at me. I then walked back to my seat, sat down, and unpacked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 289

You deserved it 38 684

Today, after creating a swear jar for my son, I came back to find a $20 bill in it and him saying, "How much does that buy?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 352

You deserved it 2 439