Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I tried to impress a girl by draping my arm over the back of her chair. I ended up elbowing her in the nose. FML
Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML
Today, in frustration, I threw a spanner across the room at work, but it bounced back and hit me in the head. I woke up in an ambulance with a cracked skull and a gorgeous EMT lady. I would've tried to ask her out, but while I was out cold I'd pissed myself, and the whole ambulance reeked of it. FML
Today, at a ski resort, I tried to impress an attractive girl on the slopes and failed, horribly. I ended up with a mild concussion and some serious cuts after tripping, tumbling and hitting my head against the ground. I don't think she was impressed. FML
Today, I was assaulted and knocked out by a girl at school for talking to her boyfriend. I woke up in the emergency room. After she knocked me unconscious, she took a knife and carved her initials into my face. FML
Today, I got lunch with a girl I really like. On the way, for some idiotic reason I decided it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the red hand on a traffic sign. I ended up slipping and slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on my face. FML
Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML
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Top comments
Wheredidgrungego 12
Yeah because all any girl wants is a guy who can crush things with his head. Idiot.
samadams42 0
They should've drawn pussy on your forhead.
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Comments (292)
nlr 9
hey! I just moderated this! I'm so proud of my self!
timtamslam 19
same! :D
nlr 9
really? my sister read this earlier saying her boyfriend wouldve done the same thing! I laughed so hard!
KVKdragon 26
neanderthal award for the day goes to you OP. YTDI.
pickles1994 18
win
disney_blonde 16
No normal girl is impressed by that. I figured guys did that to show off to other guys.
tbj42409 0
are you stupid?
Avenged7Gabe 0
no but you are
prinzess_fml 25
Hey, Avenged = OP by any chance?
dudeitsdanny 10
Nah, he's just a retarded troll. Or just a retard.
db_rainblow 0
do you really need to ask?
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
or just a troll.
sweet_candy_ 17
That is not impressive. You fail op.
young_al 4
Maybe OP likes girls that can crush cans with their head!:p YDI
sweet_candy_ 17
I wonder where he will find a girl that does that.
aardvarkish 17
My first guess is Texas. (joke. I'm from there)
valri3 0
StO0piD
hey_its_kristi 0
This is the funniest I have read in a while. I wish I had been there to see it!
ViperSeven 0
This was my FML! Someone else changed it and submitted it!
chillamastr92 0
YDI.
ViperSeven 0
This was my FML! Someone changed it ajd submitted it as their own!
KUSHaholic 0
Fuckk ur life too
KUSHaholic 0
aha ... ahahaa ....... ahahahahahahaa