Today, I woke up to a tap on my shoulder and had no idea where I was. I quickly discovered It was 11 am and I was still at the bar I had been drinking at the night before. My shoes were gone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having a good time drinking with a few friends. Next thing I know, I'm walking down an unknown street, with just one shoe, no wallet and no phone. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML
Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML
Today, I woke up after a night out at the bar, immediately remembering that I had lost my cell phone, my ID, and somehow spent $100. Feeling like shit already, my friend then went on to tell me that I flashed the entire bar, and ran around the hotel naked. FML
Today, I was woken up and kicked out of my friend's party at 3:00 in the morning. This wouldn't have been so bad if someone hadn't stolen my shoes. I had to walk for an hour in the rain, in my socks. FML
Today, after I drank way too much, my friend pulled the car over so I could throw up. Next to my pile of puke was a discarded shoe that looked remarkably like one from my favorite pair. When I got home, I realized that my left shoe was missing. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of drinking in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall, with a note saying, "Sorry dude". FML
Today, after a night of heavy drinking, I woke up handcuffed to my bed. My friends who are responsible for this think it's hilarious and claimed not to remember where they put the keys. They took pictures, then left. FML
Today, I woke up extremely hungover. I couldn't find my car keys so I went out to my car to see if I had locked them inside. I walked back to the door of my apartment barefoot and empty handed, only to find that I had locked myself out of the apartment. FML
Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML
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Top comments
Cokebottlecrazy 0
Today, some drunkard passed out in my bar. I left him there and stole his shoes, only to find out they weren't my size. FML
Stupoopy 0
Why is that FML? Pick up where you left off.. Geez.
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Comments (31)
dahl7089 0
hahahaha im sorry that is hilarious
ODEEZY 0
sounds like 1 hell of a night... hopefully those shoes weren't jordan's or some gator boots...... XD
iwontusemyname 0
please get your act together. also, it may be helpful to wear ugly, inexpensive shoes?
FareweLLibra 0
That's a bit sloppy, to say the least.
nine90 0
STOP DRINKING
necomni 0
They didn't kick you out? That's nice, you had a place to sleep. :)
iceroyalty1984 14
You need to go to bars where the employees are nicer! I passed out at a bar once and the bouncer (who was wearing a santa suit) carried me the entire way home, got me some water, took off my shoes and put them away, put me in bed, left, and checked on me in the morning!!!
member0987654321 0
#28 lmfao love the sarcasm serious like what is the bar suppose to do with someone when they pass out?
twotwelve 0
if nothing else, be lucky the bar didn't leave you outside to get robbed or killed and that they left you passed out. the least of your worries is a stolen pair of shoes. get your keys or your wallet, drive or call a cab, and go buy some new shoes if you're that upset about it. you could've lost your wallet, had your identity stolen, been raped, assaulted, and left for dead in a park. lost your shoes and woken up politely? i'd call that a win.
JIMSY 0
your just lucky someone took your shoes off otherwise you'd be fair game