Today, I woke up on the floor after I fell asleep last night while counting my tips. The pennies stuck to my face and left large blue circles from the copper. The blue won't come off. I have my senior photos today. My appointment can't be rescheduled. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a buttmunch customer brought in $7 worth of pennies I had to count and roll. As I was putting them in the deposite box at the end of my shift, I fumbled and dropped the rolls. All but one broke, spilling their contents on the floor. FML
Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck. Someone kneed me in the butt, I fell face first and broke my glasses. FML
Today, I awoke to make-up all over my face and nail polish on my hands and feet because my daughter wanted "daddy to look pretty." I have a job interview in an hour and none of it is coming off. FML
Today, I decided to take a well-deserved shower. When I let my hair down, twenty six cents fell onto the floor. I have no idea how they got there. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML
Today, at 11 p.m., after getting up for work at 4:45 a.m., I ran up the stairs to go feed my cat. I slipped on something, missed the handrail, then fell down and cracked my head on the tile floor. My hairclip was dead center, so I then had a fun night in the ER while my dang head wouldn't stop bleeding. FML
Today, as I was leaving for my chemistry exam, I stepped on one of the countless sheets of chemistry notes that littered the floor following last night's studying. I managed to slip and knock myself out in my own living room. FML
Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML
Today, I woke up on the floor with my feet still in the bed. I had passed out while vomiting into a bucket, since I couldn't make it to the bathroom in time. The bucket had spilled all over my bed. FML
Today, while doing my disabled client's makeup I got my period. I'm hoping that she didn't notice a red stain on her white bedspread when I stood up. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
UKfan97 0
its called makeup
kiwibabe021 0
no worries! most photographers are amazing at touch-ups, i should know since i am one! if not, there are programs you can use to edit them yourself. :)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (139)
disney_blonde 16
Everyone is suggesting ways to fix it, but I want to know how you fall asleep on the floor face down in pennies?
kiwicutie_101 0
seriously... there is such a thing as makeup!
purplesucker 0
Foundation, great stuff for men and women. I know some women don't like to wear it (heck, I'm one of them), but sometimes beggars can't be choosers, right? And yes, there are men who wear it too sometimes, they just don't admit it.
wenderz16 0
haha damn! that really sucks. fyl
lazyandproud 0
Makeup!!! man or woman! tht wud have helped.
Papacujo 0
Are you narcoleptic, or just a really boring counter?
wearinsexypants 0
lie. any appointment can be rescheduled.
tha_xman 0
maybe you should stop being such a cheap bastard and just throw your pennies in a jar. who the hell gives pennies as tips or even counts pennies?! I'm sure Abe Lincoln appreciates your tribute to him though.
seafea 0
Welp. Maybe it wasn't too late to join your school's Navi cosplay club for their photo.
frankiefan 0
They can photoshop about anything out. On the bright side, you can tell awesome lies about how you got in a fight with an octopus.