Miscellaneous: Today, I witnessed my girlfriend eat the dead skin from the soles... - FML

By footfood - 27/06/2011 14:56 - Slovenia

Spicy

Today, I witnessed my girlfriend eat the dead skin from the soles of her feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 399

You deserved it 7 730

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

Dude, gross

By caitplaysguitar - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I watched my boyfriend pick all the dead skin off of his feet, and then fling it at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 550

You deserved it 6 608

By feckingnasty - 26/01/2018 19:00

Today, I watched my husband pick his dead foot skin and say, "That's a keeper!" before putting it in his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 665

You deserved it 471

By i fking love docb - 04/11/2012 21:16 - Virgin Islands, U.S. - Christiansted

Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 809

You deserved it 3 354

We all do it. Don't we?

By Anonymous - 30/08/2010 07:30 - United States

Spicy

Today, I saw my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 092

You deserved it 13 772

Smells like victory

By Gagging - 15/06/2015 11:57 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I opened my front door to be greeted by what I can only describe as the stink of death. After moving furniture and lifting floorboards, frantically searching for whatever had died, I finally discovered the actual source of the stench - my girlfriend's feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 488

You deserved it 2 793

Etiquette

By FootFlakes - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Boston

Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend once again that the dry skin she picks off her feet belong in the trash, not on our coffee table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 438

You deserved it 4 525

By ScottyB - 22/12/2014 08:05 - United States - Peabody

Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 774

You deserved it 6 643

Yeet the feet

By SalonGirl - 10/03/2009 11:55 - United States

Today, I was at work and a very obese woman came in to get a pedicure. When she took her shoes off I noticed an odd black substance on her feet. I started scrubbing it off and wondered out loud, "What IS this stuff??" As a chunk of it fell onto my lip, she replied, "Girl, that's just the fungus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 113 658

You deserved it 7 293

By bloom - 17/12/2008 04:10 - France

Today, during dinner, my new girlfriend's father stroked my leg several times under the table with his bare foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 243

You deserved it 2 422

By Brian - 20/11/2012 15:50 - United States - Sandston

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house having dinner with her and her parents. I was casually playing footsie with my girlfriend under the table, until her mom stopped eating and said, "You know that's my foot, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 308

You deserved it 33 357

Next

Top comments

Badshah29 6

Monday 27 June 2011 19:03

canibalism

jutyjaty 9

Monday 27 June 2011 19:03

dude. new girl

Comments

duckys20 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 1:24

Uggghhhh I WAS getting ready to eat dinner... Apparently not anymore! You seriously need to tell her that this is neither acceptable OR normal behavior!

Daecious 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 1:36

not as bad as a dead girl eating the soles of her feet

619warrior281 5

Tuesday 28 June 2011 1:43

Your soul will be next.

charger73 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 2:16

u killed it!

ThatAkwardMoment 2

Tuesday 28 June 2011 2:23

my reaction: GAHHH O.o

hottiebrunette 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 2:29

so that's where all the fingers souls go

c_programmer 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 2:34

Relax, all this means is that she'll put anything in her mouth. Just get some alcohol in there (Isopropyl will give the best results but Ethyl will be easier to administer) before you go in.

meagann01 4

Tuesday 28 June 2011 2:42

i guess... she's a keeper? :D

imnotcraZ 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 2:52

she's a man eater (rest of the song)

621km 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 2:57

dump her! that's nasty!

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Today, my boyfriend of three months told me he's going to get tested for STDs, because he's worried about a previous partner. I'm grateful for his thoughtfulness, but I'd be even more grateful if we hadn't already slept together several times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 832

You deserved it 7 293

Today, after 26 years of confusion with my parents pronouncing it different ways, and in my mom's case, multiple ways, having to clear up how it's spelled every time I meet someone, I asked my mom how to pronounce my name. She got mad and then pronounced it three different ways while explaining. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 550

You deserved it 439

Today, I realized that everytime I get close to a guy, they either straight up friendzone me, or they string me along the talking stage until they find someone else. The holidays are coming up. This will be yet another year spending it alone without that special someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 194

Today, I was supposed to be enjoying a long-anticipated, desperately needed, weekend away. Turns out those "little stomach twinges" were actually symptoms of appendicitis. I'm stuck in the hospital, alone, recovering from surgery, while my family is enjoying our non-refundable break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 694

You deserved it 1 046

Today, we had the (great?) idea of having sex on a bean bag before my roomate got back home. Result: thousands of small polystyrene balls all over the living room. And no, they can't be picked up in 30 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 671

You deserved it 36 439

Today, my dad called in a rage, saying he caught my "cheating whore" girlfriend at a bar on a date. I had to admit to him that she and I participate in a cuckold lifestyle. The sheer disgust and disappointment in his voice has been haunting me all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 146

You deserved it 528