Intimacy: Today, I went up to a secluded mountain my boyfriend took me...

By liveforpeace_ - 28/04/2009 06:27 - Canada

Today, I went up to a secluded mountain my boyfriend took me to for our first date. As I saw another couple hooking up in the bushes, I phoned my boyfriend to tell him someone found our secret spot. His Bob Marley ringtone started playing from the bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 235 380

You deserved it 13 596

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Out in the wild

By Welpthatwasfast - 10/06/2016 07:57

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to mix it up and find a good place outdoors to have fun. After an hour of climbing up a rocky mountainside to a completely isolated clearing, out of the way of any hiking path, he was still so paranoid that he finished within 20 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 438

You deserved it 2 158

By anonymous - 14/07/2012 05:06 - United States - Columbus

Today, my boyfriend and I were at a park, alone, late at night. Things were getting kind of heavy and he started undressing me, when we heard a loud "Hey!" and a flashlight coming through the bushes. My boyfriend then decided to ditch me, while still holding my shirt and bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 521

You deserved it 9 893

By embarassed - 08/08/2009 14:53 - United States

Today, I went for a hike with my new boyfriend on a fairly deserted trail my ex-husband had shown me awhile back. In all my hikes there, I've never seen another person and figured it would be okay to get intimate. Guess who came hiking past? That's right, my ex-husband. And our 8yr old son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 106

You deserved it 73 054

I know where I'm going

By Anonymous - 18/11/2023 10:00 - Australia

Today, I went on a hiking date with my significant other. Trying to be adventurous and assertive, I suggested we take a shortcut through the woods. We got hopelessly lost and ended up spending the night in a deserted ranger station. Turns out, my idea of adventure is not quite as romantic as it sounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 645

By not even a sexy bushfire - 25/10/2012 16:27 - Australia - Kelmscott

Today, my boyfriend and I went on a romantic date to a botanical garden in the hills. A giant bushfire erupted in the hills on our way, meaning we're now stuck out here because the roads are closed. So romantic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 792

You deserved it 2 483

By legallyblondemad - 29/08/2009 19:56 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at the park with my new boyfriend. We were sitting between some trees, when some of his mates turned up at the park. He pushed me behind a tree so his mates wouldn't see and went to join them in a game of football. He pretended not to know me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 938

You deserved it 5 284

By XxMe123xx - 19/08/2010 00:51 - France

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to record us having sex and me screaming his name. He set it as my ringtone without telling me. I had my phone volume on high as I was hanging out with my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 526

You deserved it 10 934

By Anonymous - 06/08/2018 00:00 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were on a picnic date out in the country, things got a little heated. When we were switching positions, he screamed and started running around. Turns out neither of us noticed the beehive in the tree above us until his dick got stung. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 244

You deserved it 1 109

Caught in 4K

By Nothing Special - 23/12/2015 06:54 - United States - Hixson

Today, it's been a week since I flew down to stay with my long-distance boyfriend. We went on long walks on the shore, under the stars, and had an unforgettable picnic viewing the sunset. I just now received a message of screenshots displaying him attempting to hook up with another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 905

You deserved it 1 799

By poisonivyandbigfoot - 19/09/2017 16:00

Today, I was playing a game on my boyfriend's phone when he got a text from a girl saying, "last night was so fun." When I asked him about it, he panicked and said, "we were hunting Bigfoot." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 111

You deserved it 313

Spadiethestar 0

Tuesday 28 April 2009 16:08

Aouch.. poor you.. Well at least you know where you stand with this worm of a man.... And, btw, sorry to have to say that, but get yourself checked for STD, such a loser may have fooled around without protection...

z620 0

Monday 22 February 2010 6:18

don't worry about a thing because every little thing is gonna be alright

Comments

aresC 0

Wednesday 29 April 2009 6:00

@#2: +1 internets to you, sir

Trooth 13

Wednesday 29 April 2009 6:19

woo there's smarties on here (*cough* #12) plus plus, haha about #2 and #6 :D

ccclaire_ 0

Wednesday 29 April 2009 6:34

#15 HUGE FAIL Bob Marley continues to remain a legend and everyone should atleast acknowledge that ONE LOVE!

Devonta2008 0

Wednesday 29 April 2009 7:21

dude that guy ****

dragonmystik3030 0

Wednesday 29 April 2009 8:29

well #331. who says they were not in a car? mountains have roads ya know. op says first date, saying first date could mean there was alot more dates after that one.. people talk about things. maybe such things as who has what ringtone. maybe she has heard it ring when she was with him? hell maybe she even got the tone for him:P you fail #34 in theory when your on a mountain you WILL have better phone signal than you would on flat ground. secluded does not mean in the middle of ******* nowhere lol and being a mountain maybe the ******* phone tower was there, best place to put one :) #35. first date does NOT mean they didnt all ready know each other :P #37 maybe she is into photography and went back to take picsof "a good view"? (maybe she is nuts) #38 #40 i agree #44 see #35 lol above* #49 i disagree on 33 having brain cells #89 if she was following him and being "creepy" why woukd she ring him to saysomeone is making out in their spot? ******** #91 i cant help it but My phone allways rings when someone calls it lol i cant be bothered reading any more :)