Today, I went to the waterpark and my kids were fighting so I grounded them both. We concluded the day by boogey boarding on a mechanical wave. There was so much water I didn't realize my boobs had completely fallen out of my bikini. As revenge, my kids didn't tell me. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was at the waterpark. I decided to go down a slide shaped like a funnel. On the way down, my bikini bottom untied. Then I got lodged in a V shape, arse first, in the hole at the funnel exit, exposing myself to the entire pool until I could slither out. FML
Today, I went down a water slide. Halfway through, I got stuck behind some kids who were blocking the tube. Seconds later, a big-boned lady crashed into my back. Her solution to break the blockade was to start kicking my back repeatedly as hard as she could. The kids still wouldn't move. FML
Today, I was at the pool with two boys I babysit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I was at a water park with my family. While on the 100ft slide, my father decided it would be a great idea to pants me. I slipped and went down the 100ft slide naked for everyone to see. FML
Today, I took my sister and her friend to the new swimming pool in our area. They wanted to go down one of the slides, so I went up with them. At the top of the stairs, my sister's friend kicked me in the balls and then pulled my trunks off. They pushed me down the slide naked. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I was swimming in the ocean with my best friend and a giant wave came and knocked off the bottom of my bikini. My friend told me that she would go get another bottom so I could walk onto the very crowded beach. She left me for half an hour, laughing from the shore with her entire family. FML
Today, I took my kids to the beach. My autistic son decided it was a good idea to pretend he was drowning. I tried to tell onlookers he was fine and not to worry. My son popped out of the water and laughed hysterically at them. FML
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Top comments
hungarian93 0
why wuld u ground them. then let them play more? makes no sense. bad parenting. ydi
Sportsfan86 3
kids: 1 you: 0
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Comments (212)
angel55033 12
who'd want to tell you and ruin everyones free entertainment lol
Abstract13apple 0
nice back want to show me the front
Peytonlikesme 0
Same happend 2 me!!!
sappel 4
what I'd like to know is what water park is open in fall almost winter?.... in Colorado??
Twistedsoul_fml 0
indoor waterpark?
thejacl 0
43- then you're just the right person to ask... do you have in door waterpark(s)?
crowbar87 0
I have heard of indoor pools but not water parks that's kind of cool
adsc04 0
yes there is indoor waterparks, in minnesota there is at least so why wouldn't they have them in Colorado.. if not maybe they were on vacation
crowbar87 0
yea I live in Utah and all we have are pools some states are cooler then others the bitchy Mormons probably think it is a sin lol
nature_girl_08 14
the Great Wolf Lodge happens to be an indoor water park, and a heated one at that. So it's entirely possible, though i agree with the confusion of why she would go to a water park in fall/winter in Colorado. OP, i have to say this is rather funny. though i'm sorry you had to be so embarrassed, you should always do a "boob check" when at a waterpark wearing a bikini. however, you probably should have left if you were trying to ground your kids. telling them they're going to be punished, then letting them play is sending mixed signals. if you really wanted to let them enjoy it, you may have wanted to wait until you got home to ground them. though i'm not a parent, so maybe that's just how you do it :)
sallen0046 4
That's why you don't wear a bikini or a strapless suit to a water park. It's not the responsibility of your children to maintain coverage of your breasts. Dress appropriately and pay more attention.
mkat04 0
word.
yusaku02 20
>Mother >Bikini Time to grow up.
TaylorTotsYumm 10
If you've got a nice body, flaunt it.
funzcpl 0
I'm a mom, wear bikinis, AND I'm grown. now, if it was a thong bikini then, yes i would say the same thing
CheshireKattt 0
how did u nit notice ur boobage falling out
ThreatDriver 0
Thats ****** awesome xD
MfailK 0
ha boobies
nerdsgetmehot 23
I can never understand how someone can have their top completely expose their breasts and not notice.
DocBastard 40
Nerds, I agree. If my junk started flailing around, I'd sure as hell notice. Maybe unfettered boobs feel different than a free-floating sausage link.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#51 Exactly! It seems like it would be quite obvious. To me, it would feel quite noticeable if my boobs were suddenly wandering wild and free.
generalasskicker 12
wouldn't you notice something like a draft as well praticuarly if they are wet
TaylorTotsYumm 10
I've gone surfing quite a few times, a few times without a rashguard. Sometimes it's hard to tell when your bikini top falls down, especially in water, since your whole body is covered in water, and you can't feel a draft.
Ammontou 0
When there's a LOT of water rushing around, you don't realize it until it's too late. Too much sensation. But still, a bikini that fits shouldn't let your boobs fall out.