By hotmommy - 20/12/2010 00:23

Today, I went to the mall with my daughter. She asked me if she could go see Santa, so I said yes. She made me sit on his lap with her, and that's when I felt something on my bum. Let's just say Santa had a present for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks 45 207
You deserved it 6 617

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Well... It beats the present being for your daughter at least. Santa has got a nice treat for you stowed away in his sack.

I bet it was big :D


I bet it was big :D

I_R_Genius 3

Looks like santa has more than a candy cane for your sack OP. Just don't use it as a stocking stuffer.

was it a red ryder carbine-action, two hundred shot range model air rifle with a compass in the stock and a thing which tells time!!?? be careful, you'll shoot your eye out..

Haha! ^ This guy wins

where can I get in on santa's action?

stormer461 13

17 "A thing which tells time" pretty sure it's called a clock. I'm sure you'll like it since you like em so much you'd put in your BB gun.

29- stop living under a rock bro.. oh and actually its a sun dial not a clock

17: Pure Win.

17 uber pwnage!

habeybaby25 11

17: ahahaha epic win!

doctor_itsmylife 3

Well at least now you know santa is REAL!

I add this to my favorite just because of 17s comment!!! WIN

haha 17: pure epicness

it's a line from a movie

no shiitt, it's Santa, whatt so you expect?(;

17 epicc pwnage!:D

Link5794 18

Carbine refers to the size of the gun, not the reloading action.

#152 What movie was it from?

A Christmas story.

Well... It beats the present being for your daughter at least. Santa has got a nice treat for you stowed away in his sack.

"I passed through the seven layers of the candy cane forest, through the sea of twirly, swirly gumdrops, and then I walked through the Lincoln Tunnel"

#4, you have the same picture as me. Does... does the world end now?

PurpleSleep, you've ruined Elf for me. DAMN YOU!!

hairt 4


yaknowiverse 0

do you like Green Day by any chance? you share a birthday with the drummer, Tré

Nice one!!!


Would it happen to be another child?

baylebear 0

hahaha that's funny =p

roketkween 0

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What is wrong with you?

mathew17986g 2

well sounds like you REALLY got to know Santa this year lol

alaaloo_fml_fml 0

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wow ignorant much???

alaaloo_fml_fml 0

15- Someone doesn't know how to joke haha. Think, does that really ever happen anywhere else?

haha Canada ftw xD

It probably happens where horny old dudes live which is all around the world.

16- i agree, why do u think i was always so afraid to sit on santas lap as a kid? I knew wayyy to much for my age haha

nacy 4

and look at your picture now...

alaaloo_fml_fml 0

79- ?

he probably meant that to 63.

16- what? guys don't pop boners anywhere else but America? that's just fckn stupid...

alaaloo_fml_fml 0

105- Haha I see. 112- That's not what I meant at all. If you re-read my comment, you will see, first off I'm being sarcastic. Second, I meant that pedo-Santas would only exist in America, in my opinion. Yes I realize just because he got hard doesn't mean he's necessarily a creep. But he's no young man either, he should have better self control.

He got hard for the mom. How on earth would that make him a pedo?

alaaloo_fml_fml 0

132- He's playing Santa, in my opinion, that's unacceptable. Who knows how many time that's happened.

you should really just stop talking. you are making yourself look even more stupid each time you try to explain.

alaaloo_fml_fml 0

137- If you don't agree with what I'm saying, you can go somewhere else. No one is forcing you to read this.

@131, it says no where that santa was an old man. There can be men in their early twenties dressed as santa just to take the job. Besides, a doubt any man has total control over their boners

#138 if we don't agree with what you are saying we can instead call you an idiot. just stop talking k?

XnikiroxX 0

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MuchDance90s 0

you should report him you don't know for sure it was meant for you originally, and if it wasn't, they should find a non-pedo Santa :-(

Santas cheating on ms clause... what's the world coming to? :O

#8: Report yourself too while you're at it, thought police. There's NOTHING there indicating the boner wasn't for the mother. And besides, guys can't control getting a boner or not. The fact that he got one doesn't means he was about to do something bad to the woman. He just got a boner ( and was probably dying of embarrassment.) Case in point, nothing else happened, or she'd have mentioned it. It was probably a terribly awkward moment for both, but not a crime. No need for "reporting" or firing the guy. What are you, the Gestapo? Sure sounds like that sort of mindset... rushing to report the slightest thought and all. Sure, maybe the guy was a jerk and enjoyed the situation rather than feeling awkward, but no one got raped or harmed. And at the very least, if she chooses to report him it should be for the boner poking her, and NOT for your out-of-place assumptions about the boner being for the kid and not the mother. That's so wrong.

WingsFan80 4

I side with 31. thats what's wrong with this ****** up country, people jump to conclusions way to fast. Ignorance is what's wrecking this country.

31, you made my day!

Agree with 31

sure_burt 5

I think she should get over herself, I doubt it was a boner.

maybe it was just a long dick? i personally store mine coiled up in my pocket

itsgen 16

totally agree

I think now the world ends....

kewlclass99 0

? is are you hot?

schwancy 2

She are is.

are is she? haha jk

KFCkoolaidWaterm 0

Nah, she not is are. She only are is sometimes.

KFCkoolaidWaterm 0

Nah, she not is are. But on some rare occasions, she can be are is.

mikey2469 0

his comment read "question" is, are you hot? in short hand but jumpin down his throat is fun.

dudeitsdanny 9

This is why typing out words and using punctuation can avoid confusion..

RedPillSucks 31

Is you is, or is you aint.

KFCkoolaidWaterm 0

You must be such a looker considering the fact that you just turned on a wrinkley, old, fat guy.

RedPillSucks 31

Pretty much anything can turn on a wrinkly old fat guy. Trust me. I'm an expert (at being a wrinkly old fat guy, not turning them on)

how do you know he was old, wrinkly and fat? there's nothing stopping a young man putting on a fat suit and working as santa.

KFCkoolaidWaterm 0

Is there a reason you're so defensive?

you have been a very naughty girl ;)

haha nice one

are u asian baby cakes

are u asian baby cakes


haha yeah dude. *headbut*