Today, I went to the hospital with severe chest pain, thinking it was a heart attack. Turns out now I just can't have booze, pop, chocolate, fruit with skins, seeds, tomatoes, or mint. I'd rather have the heart attack. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to the emergency room with chest pain. I didn't have a heart attack, but I now have a broken nose after passing out and face-planting in the waiting room. FML
Today, I desperately needed a mental health day, so I took the day off work and got some junk food and wine. A few hours later, I'm in hospital with gallstones and pancreatitis, needing an emergency surgery. My mental health day turned into multiple weeks off work, and a lot of pain. FML
Today, I woke up with chest pain. It hurt just to breathe, but my parents made me go to school anyway. We're now sitting in the emergency room. FML
Today, I was at work and got chest pains and a headache so bad, I vomited. My supervisor took my blood pressure twice and it was dangerously high both times. I went to the hospital, and after 3 hours of waiting, I got the most expensive lecture ever on drinking too many energy drinks. FML
Today, I threw up due to food poisoning. Despite my fever and pain, my wife is completely convinced it was from secretly drinking, and I am now "PERMANENTLY FORBIDDEN" from drinking anything alcoholic. FML
Today, I went to see a doctor due to some gastric distress I have. I came out with directions to buy a blood pressure monitor, I'm prohibited from doing sports, and have a possible diagnosis of arterial hypertension which I am way too young to have. FML
Today, after months of being told I have pneumonia by different doctors, I decided to go to another hospital with better staff. There I learned that I will actually need to have open heart surgery to replace two valves in my heart. FML
Today, I was just released from hospital after a heart attack. As a 37 year-old woman with healthy habits and no family history of heart issues, the doctors have no idea why it happened. So instead of telling me how to change my lifestyle, they told me to proceed as usual, and hope that it doesn't happen again. FML
Today, I'm in agony. I can't eat or drink anything without being in pain, including water. Doctors don't know what's wrong with me, and can only prescribe me painkillers I can only take 3 times a day. FML
Today, I went to get Covid test because I had chest pain and shortness of breath. Turns out, I just have depression and anxiety. FML
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Top comments
SwiftFaux 0
Good lord. So yogurt for lunch, then?
LiyIa_fml 8
53 is an example of why I dislike my generation.
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Comments (194)
tarinazsexy 1
Gerd, acid reflex horrible I know how you feel some days better then others. Stress caused mine, hang in their try to stay away from those foods and eat more bland foods. Not fun I know. Sorry your going through this.
Gencade 0
Wat the heck is pop?
LemonLolly 10
Soda.
taradeborde87 3
If that's you're mindset, OP, then just go ahead and eat all of what you listed. If you'd rather have the heart attack, then eating all that and having the symptoms shouldn't bother you.
taradeborde87 3
Or how about **** you OP, S seriously, I hope you're joking, although it would be a bad joke. But to say "**** my life I'd rather have a heart attack than not be able to pig out on a few foods". There's still a lot you can eat, so shut the **** up and get over yourself.
ImTheAlpha 30
What's pop?
emchocolat_fml 25
Oh, for heaven's sake. Look things up on Google if you don't understand them. Pop means soft drinks, fizzy drinks, Coca-Cola and so on. Make the most of FML to actually learn something.
stargazur 9
No chocolate? You poor bastard... :(
RockNRollAndrew 18
Permanently ?
nchic01 17
tomatoes are fruits with skin and seeds!
pizzaloverchick 9
that makes my allergy to red dye 40 seem pathetic(it is in almost everything red)
Divine_Mamma 11
What are you allergic to, deliciousness?