Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck. Someone kneed me in the butt, I fell face first and broke my glasses. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I broke my glasses. How did I break my glasses? A cow kicked me in the face at work. FML
Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML
Today, I walked into the glass door of my boss’s cabin and broke my spectacles. Thank god for a backup pair, right? Wrong. I fell down the stairs and broke them too. FML
Today, I was going shopping with a friend. I got up to get off the train and landed on my ass. Not only had I walked into the metal bar, I'd broken my $800 glasses, and the train doors had closed, with my friend on the other side of the doors. FML
Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML
Today, I felt something hit my eye as I was riding on my bike. My glasses ended up falling off. I looked for them for ten minutes before giving up. I ran over them. FML
Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML
Today, I dropped some glass at my job while putting it on the shelf. A shard bounced off the floor and went up my nose. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs while holding some dirty glasses from my room. I ended up pulling pieces of glass from my body. Meanwhile all my mom cares about is the fact that I broke three of her favorite glasses. FML
Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML
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Top comments
tkdgold03 5
it must not have been heads up...
scenechic 5
Happy Friday Thee 13th.
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Comments (127)
GirlyGal123 3
Hey well today is Friday the 13th!!!
CommanderBalls 10
n
trollierthanthou 1
what is up with all the ironic fmls today. I mean an unlucky penny, and a chick who lost ten pounds but her pants busted still out!
trollierthanthou 1
but still OP you probably needed some good luck, as do most of us, but really how often are you short ONE cent?
trollierthanthou 1
69 how does a Five dollar bill help? I mean maybe a gallon of gas and you could coast home or a happy meal but really five bucks or a penny ain't paying the bills. Kinda pointless, leave it for a hobo.
ladyLALAA 29
Duh, 24 haven't you seen Donnie Darko!
bluejayscheer 7
It's Friday the 13th!
momo1972 3
Sounds like luck to me
NothingsEasy 4
Should've Slapped a hoe
alexab1310 9
That's what happens when you try to pick loose change up from the ground, bum.
waynenight 4
you're a bum... ya bum