Today, I went bowling with my parents. This cute guy works there and he always flirts with me. My mom just so happened to see it today. As we left, she says to him, "You know she's 13, right?" I'm 17. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML
Close shave
Today, I had dinner at a local fast-food joint. There's an employee there that I usually talk to and flirt with, so I thought maybe it was time to ask for her number. After a small conversation and almost getting to the point, she told me, "I'm 17." I'm 23. FML
Cougar
Today, a cute new guy I always run into at work hit on me. Turns out he's only 18. I'm old enough to be his mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to take me out bowling. My mom was going to take us. My parents ended up bowling with us. I had a double date with my parents. FML
DAD! FATHER! WHAT THE FRICK?
Today, I went bowling with my family. When my brother went up to buy a drink refill, the guy at the counter kindly refilled it for free and told him that he thought I was pretty. My dad laughed and shouted, "Pretty ugly!" FML
Not a wife guy
Today, I went to a restaurant with my mother, where the waiter complimented my "wife". I'm not 18, and she's over 40. FML
Chris Hansen time
Today, I met and asked a cute girl out on a date. We decided to meet at a fancy restaurant downtown. When I got there I saw her sitting with what turned out to be her parents. They made a huge scene, calling me a pedophile and a low-life. Apparently, the girl was 16 years-old. I'm 25. FML
You tried
Today, while shopping, I saw a little girl and her mom. The girl was pouting so I tried to cheer her up by asking her if she was a princess, because she was so pretty. She smiled but her mom looked at me with disgust and told me to, "Get lost, pedo." I'm a 17-year-old girl. FML
Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really like. He brought up that there was a person staring at us from a nearby table. That person was my mom. FML
Grown up
Today, I went out to dinner with my boyfriend and his mom. The hostess asked if I needed "the kid's menu," remarked how I look "so grown up for your age," and asked what grade I was in. I said I'm in university. She laughed as if it was the best joke ever told. I'm 22. FML
Top comments
BADDiam 4
Parents sometimes shit on our moods.
Bonghittinglover 3
protective moms.. Better than having a mom that doesn't give a shit about you.
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Comments (188)
TalkinSmack 6
you know ur moms a bitch right?
warlock970 10
haha and you know one day your children will say this to each other too like "you know our moms a ******* bitch" you should respect your elders. OP's mother was being protective as her mother doesn't wants a man for her daughter who works at a bowling alley. What ever you do dont tell your mom that you hate her that would break her heart completely you stupid stupid bitch!!
BigScott 13
Could be worse, there's nothing wrong with working at a bowling alley. Perhaps everyone should get your approval of their job before dating?
AmethystRain 20
39 - I'd rather see my daughter dating a friendly guy who works in a bowling alley instead of some lazy unemployed asshole who treats her like shit.
TalkinSmack 6
lol ummm is calling me a stupid stupid bitch the best thing u can think of? ops mom has to cut the cord...
WOLFEYES72 2
Warlock970 are you stupid? Since when is working at a bowling alley a terrible thing? For all we know the guy is also a highschool student so he probably can't become a doctor right this second. You make it sound like anyone who holds an entry level job isn't worthy of the OP. We don't know them so why even make that assumption? Oh, and BTW learn to punctuate, your comment is a ******* mess. And for all you know the person you called a bitch is your elder, so how about you just respect peers and elders alike? GTFO and grow up.
Wheredidgrungego 12
Wow this really made me wanna go bowling all of a sudden.
Millman_fml 9
Yeah, I agree with 15...who goes bowling with their parents ethier way? Lol
mcrluverchick 9
Well I'm sure you do because you look about 8 years old...
BADDiam 4
At first i thought his name was MILFman..
IbanezSprinter 0
20 that's what I was thinking.. Anyways, I do stuff with my parents and I'm 15, who cares.
CronosDage 0
He doesn't go bowling because he works on a mill, or is a milkman. hurrr
ukrage 1
20 you are a bamf for that. it's exactly what I was thinking:)
rhpsfan9 10
Show him your drivers licenses to prove your parents wrong
iGlasses 4
That's assuming she has one.
sammybearbby 6
well by the age of seventeen it's pretty normal to have some form of ID.
mcrluverchick 9
Oh wow that sucks for you OP. My own mom would have probably told me something cute and witty to say to him. Or she could have done what your mom did being that she is bipolar.
stacianichole 2
bipolar? so you're a psychiatrist and can diagnose extreme highs and lows based on an isolated incident? fascinating... idiot.
karagana 5
She's not bipolar, she's bi-WINNING! (sory for the worst Charlie Sheen reference ever, I couldn't resist)
chelseaaababyyy 17
73 - calm down, she could have either been joking or her mom actually was diagnosed with bipolar disorder by a doctor. idiot..
iGlasses 4
At least she didn't say you had aids. ;P
raphanne_fml 33
Yeah or she didn't asked her to pay $27,601 for some obscure reasons...
raphanne_fml 33
*ask
SteelersBaby3 0
Like the reference!
sammybearbby 6
parents are embarrassing, ha.
ukrage 1
so true
suprmidgt 0
why are the parents in this this world so horrible to their children? I think this site is making me lose faith in humanity.
raphanne_fml 33
But at least we can have a good laugh about it :D
omgcookeys 15
But, op said he was cute.. And all of the 53 year olds I've seen dont look "cute" plus, if he was a pedo, I think she would have noticed...
iluvboobies 9
Boners, you seem to be suspiciously well informed about the lifestyle of a 53 year old low-life hitting on 17 year old girls and cleaning bowling shoes while polishing balls.
Hi_I_am_Q 0
Try the bowling alley across the street. There are a whole bunch of perves who would like you...
sunflower226 0
but hey, at least that gives you something to laugh abt next time...a reason to talk to him/share a laugh. confidence = sexy. ex "I hope my mom didn't embarass you last time; she's always teasing like that"