Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally alone and things were starting to get intimate. I was on top of him trying to be sexy, when in my excitement I giggled and called him a "silly girl" by accident. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML
Today, things were getting hot with my boyfriend and I started to breathe heavy and moan. He then says to me, "Babe, can you calm down, we're having sex not running a marathon." FML
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. In the heat of the moment, I said his name. He immediately stopped, gave me a deadly serious look and said "Huh? What?" FML
Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend and told him how smitten I was with him. He responded by giving me a wedgie. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, he called me "Mom." FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML
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Top comments
YoshiTimex3 0
he might be talking bout his past girlfriends 0:
mdanielle 0
No 5, WOW. That's a really sad view of marriage... When I get married it will be because I love my husband more than my own life. I hope someday you'll did that kind of real happiness, not the cheap pleasure that comes from one night stands.
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Comments (57)
iheyman 0
Lmfao!!
trestie 0
'guilty pleasure' actually sounds sweet, dont take it ad literam
COSlappy 0
Chocolate is said to be a guilty pleasure, ******* idiots read all of it to understand the context.
bandofsand 10
Yes because eating it makes you fat. No such problem with a little bedroom fun.
MyDarkHeart 0
Woww....... That totally sucks... HAHAHA
omghehehe 0
Kick his ass out of bed!!!!
ClownSmilely 0
well if you can't have it all then have all you can is what I always say lol
guitarheroine 0
wow, this guy is an ass. Wonder if his wife knows.
swkisses5 0
*awkward silence* slowly exit the room lol then run
Haterman123 0
ydi for saying that
randomgiirly1010 0
hahahaha that really sucks.