Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. We were getting into the mood so I tried to eat the popcorn kind of sexually, causing me to choke on the popcorn and throw up. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I took my girlfriend to a scary movie, hoping I could comfort her at a scary part. Instead when a scary part came on, she reacted by throwing up all over my lap and the person in front of us. FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my friends. All throughout, some guy kept making weird sounds and breathing deeply. Midway through the movie, he got even louder. Just as I was about to snap, chunks of vomit sprayed over my chair and shoulders. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, I was going down on my boyfriend. I'm usually in control and do my own thing. He tried taking control and I ended throwing up on him. FML
Today, I was eating a corndog, when my boyfriend jokingly told me to "take it deeper". I did, and ended up choking and throwing up all over the table. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I took my crush to see a movie. During the movie, I made a move and put my arm around her. As I reached over, my hand went straight into the popcorn tub, and I knocked it over. It spilled everywhere, all over her lap, all over me, and on the floor. I spent the next 15 minutes trying to clean up, while she awkwardly avoided eye contact. FML
Today, I threw up during sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
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Top comments
Nederlander95 14
If you puke from popcorn I'm terrified of what happens when you go down on him
Cheezits4dayz 14
Mmmm yeah... does this turn you o- BLEAAAUUGH
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Comments (67)
redstone7693 29
Just eat the popcorn normally...
Feldgrep 8
Yea see this is one of those things where you don't give some vague, obscure hint like "sexually eating popcorn" that your in the mood. Just initiate it. 9 times out of 10 it'll turn him on even more
AineK 9
Eating the popcorn sexually.. That's not a thing?
cooliounleashed 3
id luagh so much haha
Walshey93 10
How on earth does one eat popcorn sexually?!
mosquito19 14
were you watching Schindler's List?
AbelChu 3
just soso
RayvenWhite 12
XD EPIC FAIL
DanielleinDC 33
There are some foods you can't eat seductively. Popcorn is one. Next time try: pickles, carrots, lollipops, candy canes, or any long, thin foods.
puppylover863 3
My name is nat...........