Today, I was trying to seduce a really good-looking girl, when all of a sudden she leaned in towards me and said, “Sorry, I’m not drunk enough to make out with you.“ FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friends set me up on a blind date. I thought it went well, and while saying our goodbyes, I leaned in to give her a kiss. She pulled way, laughed, "I'm not drunk enough for that," and left. FML
Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML
Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and said, "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML
Today, I was finally able to hang out with a girl I really liked at a party. We had a great time and spent hours together. When I leaned in for a kiss at the end of the night, she stopped me and said , "You're a great guy, but we can't go out because you'd be bad for my social reputation." FML
Today, I was making out with this hot girl at a party. She was a bad kisser and I meant to say, "It's like you're 16 and don't know how to kiss" but it came out as, "It's like I'm kissing a 16 year-old." The room fell silent and she got off my lap with a disturbed look on her face. FML
Today, I decided to hit on a very attractive girl. I guess I was too drunk to remember it was my family reunion. FML
Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML
Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML
Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML
Today, I was making out with some girl at a party and noticed that she wasn't very good at it. I tried to say, "You kiss like a 16 year-old doing it for the first time" but ended up saying, "You kiss like a 16 year-old." Upon saying that, a dozen people turned and looked at me, giving weird looks. FML
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Top comments
summer4me 25
Well better luck next time. Maybe try not to be so obvious with your intentions? Or don't take it so personally since you seem to be looking for something casual
jerseygirl94 11
At least she was honest , you'll find a girl who likes you someday and she won't need to be drunk.
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Comments (51)
windyouthere 14
To bad op! Better luck next time
Cerebral_Origami 5
I would have said: "I understand. What are you drinking." :)
withered 30
"One glass of vine without the sexual predator please."
ChrisHavok 5
She was asking you to buy her a drink, OP! Should have taken the hint.
alexaazambranoo 10
Seems nice... *SARCASM*
chewsef 17
Ouch. Right in the feels.
jessaureli 8
Reply: It's okay, I'm not sober enough to remember you anyways.
AcieMcG 21
Drunk enough to be rude though.
heatherrr17 19
Ouch.. But you'll find someone ?
bobsanction 18
At which point you reply "Well let me buy you another drink and see what happens"
withered 30
Rape. That's what happens.
NerdGirl321 27
REJECTED!!!!!!!