Today, I was running a marathon. I stopped to massage my stiff legs, when an elderly spectator taunted, "Oohhh yeah, that's it! Massage those legs good, boy!" She looked about 70. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was running a marathon for my school. Two hot girls started talking to me, so I glanced at them, and smiled. I turned back, just in time to knee a little boy in the face. FML
Today, I told my gym trainer I’d do anything to get in shape. He challenged me to run a mile without stopping. I agreed, then got winded halfway through and dramatically collapsed on the track. A 70 year-oldish woman jogged past me and said, “You’ll live.” FML
Today, I finished a full marathon and just wanted to relax and get pampered by my husband afterwards. Instead, I spent the evening taking care of him and his back because he had a spasm. Don't worry, he feels much better now. Meanwhile, I can’t move my legs. FML
Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML
Today, as I was taking an evening jog around my neighbourhood, I passed an elderly woman. I grinned at her as sign of friendliness to a common pedestrian. She grinned back. Whilst staring at my crotch. FML
Today, I volunteered at a 50 km trail race for charity and was at the service of a walker. It was fun until after the walk was completed, when he made me take off his boots and socks, and massage his big, super stinky, sweaty bare feet. His putrid feet were inches from my face the entire time. FML
Today, I went outside to start jogging for improving my ever declining fitness. A kind stranger yelled, “You’re doing great!” as I was wheezing after my first block. I was sitting on a bench. FML
Today, as I was jogging on the boardwalk, an old guy tripped me with his cane. As I was getting back up, I heard him say to his wife, "I wanted to see if she would actually fall." FML
Today, I went on a run. Going a decent pace, I passed a woman walking her dog. I joked, "C'mon! Keep up!" Thirty feet later I stepped in mud, rolled my ankle and fell. The woman walked by as I lay in agony, and told me to keep up. FML
Today, while going for my daily run, a woman stopped me and said, "I think it's so great that people of your size are comfortable enough to run and show their bodies in public." FML
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Top comments
truehitman2010 0
we need a Wtf? button
oliveindamiddle 0
I don't think this is a fyl or a ydi... it's just one of those moments in life where you're like.. WTF. :)
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Comments (157)
creedaddict 9
hot!
CitrusGirl 0
Before people jump on me I will clarify: every time there's an FML about a guy objectifying a girl the response in many (not all) cases is Female: that's so horrible and wrong! Guys are so horrible! You should castrate and report him! Male: Hey, he thinks you're hot that's a good thing! Learn to appreciate a compliment! And what with all the feminist lesbian Nazi bitches? I'm curious to see if the response will be the now that the roles are switched.
truehitman2010 0
are you shure it's not Herbert the pervert dressed as a girl
gardianlh24 0
could also be Charlie sheen!
Iloreanes 0
YDI for buying a $3,500 necklace.
JenL_fml 7
Run! As fast as you can... o.o
tellithowitis 13
Awkward....
NagatoPain 4
apperently this kid doeast get it at all...pedophile
gardianlh24 0
Maybe she's Charlie Sheen! Winning!!!
ammmeor 4
You found your ride home!
PassTheDutch 0
hahaha @ 7. that was funny. I love family guy.