Miscellaneous: Today, I was preparing dinner for my in-laws for the first time....

By Laviolette - 23/02/2012 22:01 - France

Today, I was preparing dinner for my in-laws for the first time. Nervous, I accidentally spilled the pasta into the sink. With nothing else to prepare, I quickly scooped it all back out. No-one would have been any the wiser, if the kitchen sponge hadn't shown up in the middle of the meal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 206

You deserved it 39 886

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Same thing different taste

By Damnsoup - 03/07/2009 00:12 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to my fiancé's house to have dinner with his family for the first time. Trying to be polite at the end of the meal I went to take the plates in to the kitchen. I overestimated how heavy the half-finished soup pot was, and threw soup all over myself and future mother-in-law. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 274

You deserved it 6 986

By Anonymous - 24/11/2013 18:31 - France

Today, I was quietly admiring my boyfriend from outside the kitchen as he made us dinner, only to witness him drop a load of spaghetti on the floor, swear, then scoop it all up and place it back on the plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 541

You deserved it 4 514

By Lexi - 31/10/2009 20:15 - France

Today, after telling my best friend an idiot could make Kraft Dinner, I spilled boiling water all over my hands and forearms while attempting to strain the noodles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 212

You deserved it 36 242

By newcomer - 12/04/2017 05:00 - Canada - Kingston

Today, to treat the family, I cooked something nice in appreciation for sticking it out over the past few tough months. Unfortunately, I chose this one day to not wear my oven mitts when carrying the food to the table, spilling the food all over the carpeted floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 510

You deserved it 2 943

By Anonymous - 08/02/2016 17:43 - Austria

Today, I made a delicious casserole for dinner. Just as I was about to serve it, a bowl fell from the cupboard above, exploded on the counter and made it rain tiny, sharp glass shards on my food. I can't pick them all out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 895

You deserved it 1 786

Bon appétit

By StijnDescamps - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, for the very first time, I invited my girlfriend's parents for dinner. I bought a pre-made oven dish, just to be sure nothing could go wrong. Once at the table, her mother asked pointedly who forgot to remove the plastic foil before putting it in the oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 2 501

By Prae - 01/10/2012 05:47 - United States - Dallas

Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 665

You deserved it 2 105

Kitchen daydream

By Rordon Gamsey - 02/08/2022 16:00

Today, I was "that idiot" who spent ages making a soup stock from meat and vegetables, but then while separating it forgot to put a pan under the strainer, so I poured the finished stock down the sink, leaving me with only the boiled meat and veg sat sadly in the strainer. Takeaway chinese for tea, then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 406

By 5p4571k - 25/05/2014 17:35 - Canada - Chilliwack

Today, I was cooking dinner for my children, managing for once not to screw up and hurt myself. Then, while chopping vegetables, I accidentally sliced my finger open. The same finger that was still covered in juice from a lemon I'd just squeezed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 960

You deserved it 7 575

Speak for yourself

By Anonymous - 21/08/2019 12:00

Today, I was at a fancy family dinner. The dish I'd made was served, and as we ate, I told my aunt that I was a total failure as a cook, explaining everything wrong about my dish, in painful detail. Apparently we'd both made the same dish. That one wasn't mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 931

You deserved it 1 643

bella_coza 0

Friday 24 February 2012 1:16

Can I just say how unsanitary that really is? Ew.

kelissa_fml 16

Friday 24 February 2012 1:16

Dip it in sauce and call it a meatball?

Comments

ImSoEffedUp 10

Friday 24 February 2012 4:51

You would've been using that sponge to clean up the blood you'll be spilling..... I'd definitely punch u dead in da nose or mouth.... If not both....

SLEinTN 7

Friday 24 February 2012 4:52

I always thought it meant You Dumb Idiot. Ha!

Awsumuzzie 12

Friday 24 February 2012 7:43

Dumb and idiot are the same word, that would make no good sense.

titans617230 3

Friday 24 February 2012 5:00

Like if your penis is bigger than mine

RipSchitz 0

Friday 24 February 2012 5:01

That's disgusting. Who strains pasta in a sink that has stuff in it? You actually ate it too??? Nasty!!!

geod69 8

Friday 24 February 2012 5:09

There's a better way to flavor your supper it's called spices

natasha101488 0

Friday 24 February 2012 5:19

Your just ******* nasty...

kathy_dabomb 0

Friday 24 February 2012 5:38

Ew that is disgusting!

Jaylene90 8

Friday 24 February 2012 5:47

Thanks, my mom made pasta today and that just made me wanna hurl everything out

Bassist5798 0

Friday 24 February 2012 6:16

just calm urself down if u don't your gonna do stuff like this there family there understand unless they are assholes

born_hustla 26

Friday 24 February 2012 6:16

**** the rest of your life. No off. Feel bad for you tho.

Keywords

Annoying Gamers Video games Kids Money Birthday Cute Weird Awkward Love Health Abuse Relatable Social Media Scams School Education Parents Teenagers Anger issues Family Relationship advice Capitalism Miscellaneous Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Geek Music Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had promised that the day would belong to me. But no, I had to drive 80km forth and back to pick him up from work, then he took pictures with his new camera lens, then he decided what to eat, demanded a massage, and then he just fell asleep. Happy birthday to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 166

You deserved it 270

Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 008

You deserved it 21 832

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 55 153

You deserved it 5 286

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I agree, your life sucks 54 772

You deserved it 3 541

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I agree, your life sucks 42 114

You deserved it 3 372

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I agree, your life sucks 23 119

You deserved it 4 172

Today, my psycho boss snatched a file from my hand so aggressively that I got a papercut. She then scolded me for bleeding on the papers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 94

Today, I set my parrot in the bathroom while I cleaned his cage, thinking he would be safe there. He was in fact safe, but not so the used maxi pad he chewed up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 070

You deserved it 331

Same thing different taste

Bon appétit

Kitchen daydream

Speak for yourself

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