Today, I was outside, eating a sandwich, when I noticed a homeless man was standing in front of me. Upon making eye contact, he grabbed the rest of my sandwich and ran off. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I cut my nice and tasty home-made sandwich in half to give to a homeless man. He tasted it, pulled an unimpressed face, and then stuck it in his pocket. FML
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man. I gave him my sandwich, since he needed it more than me. Seconds later, he was attacked by a flock of birds. FML
Today, I was sitting in the park eating a sandwich, when a homeless guy asked me for some spare change. I said I didn't have any. He offered an "erotic striptease" in exchange for my sandwich. I said no. He gave one anyway. I walked back to work on an empty stomach. FML
Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML
Today, I made a sandwich. When I went to grab chips, my wife snatched it. I made a second sandwich. My son came in and stole the plate when I was grabbing a seltzer. I went to make a third sandwich. No more cold cuts. FML
Today, as I was out walking, one homeless man sitting with two others asked me for something to eat. Trying to do a good deed, I bought the three men a bag of apples. They then fought viciously over them before the first man chased me for handing them to "the wrong one." FML
Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. While chatting with another dog owner, my dog managed to steal their sandwich and ran off with it. I had to chase my sandwich-thieving dog through the entire park. FML
Today, I was at the pool when I saw a man eating the food I had ordered near my seat. I immediately ran up to him and asked him to stop stealing my food. I took the food away and threw it in the trash. Seconds later the attendant came out with my actual food. FML
Today, my friend and I were playing football in the street, when out of nowhere a homeless man sucker punches me in the gut, grabs my football, and runs away laughing like a maniac. FML
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Top comments
keoct 4
dine n’ dash?
_blah_blah_blah_ 1
it's more like his life sucks and you should go get yourself another sandwich..imagine what it's like to be so desperate for food that you have to steal yank it from someone's hand and run...
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Comments (182)
dellama10 0
I love how no one on here considered OP's financial situation. Ever heard the term 'starving student'? It's pretty common for college kids to be broke between tuition and living expenses, especially if they don't have help from family or financial aid, and OP could easily be on a school or public library computer. Or maybe OP is just from a struggling family. There are plenty of people who can barely feed themselves while keeping a roof over their heads, much less afford TWO lunches because someone decided to steal the first one. OP, FYL if you're in financial straits. But if you're not, QTB.
mptothedc 0
F-your life? or F-his because he needs to steal food in order to eat?
DravvyDrav 0
Lesson learn, never look a homeless man straight in the eye...he'll steal your sammich
zackkmann21 0
hahahahahaha that's random
Iloveyou101476 0
get another sandwich then fatty. don't be greedy:P
katies94 0
he's hungry and you can have food whenever you want. so good job on your good deed of the day
hewro_failure 11
He probably needed it more than you ha
paprika_pilipili_fml 14
I'm sorry, but it's kinda funny !
yzzami 17
Some of these comments are whats wrong with the world
mkcherry 14
I would be pissed anyways. I work hard for my money to buy good food for myself and my family and being poor or homeless doesnt give him the right to take it. There are free food programs EVERYWHERE for the homeless everyday, twice a day. There are meals if he wants one, he wanted to steal. His lack of morality probably contributed to his homelessness.