Today, I was on a long-haul plane journey home from my holiday. After 5 hours, I decided to stretch my arms whilst watching a movie. Little did I know that a little girl was approaching, running down the aisle as my arm stretched out. I accidentally clothes-lined a little 9 year old girl. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year-old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML
Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall. In the spur of the moment I thrust my arm up to catch it. I didn't catch the bag, but I did catch her boob. I had to sit next to her for the rest of the flight. FML
Today, I boarded a plane. A woman decided that she didn't like where she'd put her carry on luggage and pulled it out from over my head. The heavy luggage then fell right onto my face, the wheel smacking me in the mouth and busting my lip open. She just laughed and waltzed away without a word. FML
Today, I was asleep on a plane. I woke up after feeling the plane jolt and I screamed at the top of my lungs. The little girl next to me told me I was a sissy. Everyone around us laughed. FML
Today, I was on a plane and a cute girl was getting ready to sit down beside me, but upon making eye contact, she asked to switch seats. FML
Today, while watching a movie with my girlfriend, I had to go to the bathroom. As I returned, I thought it would be cute to jump over the side of the couch and land next to her. I accidentally landed on her arm and broke her wrist. It wasn't as cute as I expected. FML
Today, I was getting onto an airplane and happened to admire the stewardess. I was walking onto the plane and was just about to talk to her when my foot slipped into the crack between the boarding ramp and the plane. Not only did she laugh as I limped to my seat but now I have bruised nuts. FML
Today, I went on a long flight. I was fortunate enough to sit next to a great girl. However, she must have thought I was not so great, because she moved to the empty seat across the aisle. Next to my dad. Who then told stories about how I always get motion sickness on airplanes. I then threw up. FML
Today, I was boarding a plane and an elderly woman asked if I could put her carry on into the overhead bin. Eager to help, I energetically lifted her bag up, and smacked her in the face with it. FML
Today, I was running on the treadmill at my local gym when I saw a girl I like a lot. I called out to her to say hi. As she was coming over, I accidentally stepped on the belt with one foot, crashed down on the treadmill, and continued to slide down in front of her, emerging with a gashed knee and arm. FML
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Top comments
onebadsummer 0
brats parents should have their child under control.
CyclonePsycho 1
You know Twinklestar, I am glad you are privileged enough to be able to fly first-class anytime you want. But the rest of us simply can't chose the more expensive options. It's not up to everyone else to adjust themselves accordingly because children are roaming around the plane like little demons. YOU need to control YOUR kids. Is it too much to ask that school-aged kids not act like maniacs in tight crowded spaces? Just because we expect that kind of crap doesn't mean we should tolerate it. Sure she was just going to the bathroom. But why wasn't she walking? Babies and toddlers acting up is one thing, but that girl should have been taught better than to run down the aisle of a plane. Nine years old is old enough to know how to behave in public. She's not "little" by any standards.
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Comments (130)
ILIEKGIRLS 5
oh god, that gave an awesome image XD
CallMeHush 1
Sweet! I hope you spiked a half empty coke can off her forehead while she was down.
suckaaaaa 0
ew how'd you know she was 9???
Boddmon 0
what ew? it was probably an estimation.
g3rusz 6
It's rather an IMMD than an FML... :D
Mustardnight 3
Atm im thinking of that youtune vid where the breakdancer cloks a little kid while spinning.
McBonakins 0
Followed up with a drop kick and a power bomb right? Down for the 3 count? You sir, are the future of the Air Marshall.
Flutist 3
I said you deserved it because you sir earned it. You most likely have traveled the country with crying babies and annoying toddlers, so you have been plotting this. Nice try making me believe you did this on accident. You yawn, look over the shoulder, see the girl and pow, you showed the little demented child. So I say you deserved it, for all the pain and suffering. This was a gift from god. Bet she began screaming and you were blamed. But it was the most epic moment of your life. You are my hero. IT wouldn't be so bad if kids would just walk around for like two seconds to stretch their legs. But they have SHORT legs, I am able to sit in my seat and not run around like I'm on crack and I'm tall for my age. Southwest has small seats. I think people need to watch their damn kids.
Flutist 3
Usually there is some turbulence with puns, but from take off to landing you aced it.
TheLetterZero 7
Uuuggghhh... the puns.... That's enough... Though shaister's were amazing.
dispatcher 0
hahaha she deserved it...kids on planes are annoying as hell!
nenagh_ 0
she deserves it for RUNNING DOWN THE ILSE IN A MOVING PLANE.
Ascaryrobot 0
You're aware that THE PLANE MOVING has nothing to do with this right? It wouldn't make any difference to the plane
fireandice27 0
Hahaha yeah I feel slightly sorry for the little girl, but really she shouldn't have been running on the plane. She totally deserved the hit