Today, I was in a parking lot looking for a spot, and after driving around for a long while I finally found one. A homeless man was taking a shit on it. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML
Today, I walked out to the parking lot and caught a homeless man laying a fat steamer on the hood of my car. FML
Today, I was at work, a grocery store, and my manager came up to me while I was on my lunch break. He told me that a customer said someone in the parking lot had been loitering around the cars. I went outside to investigate and saw a drunk man pooping on the front of a car. That car was mine. FML
Today, I walked in on a homeless guy peeing on a turd on the floor of the women's restroom at the park. I'm a janitor for the city. FML
Today, both toilets in my house were occupied, so I had to shit outside. FML
Today, I caught my new neighbor sticking his knob inside my car and pissing on my seats. His reason? I parked in his spot. FML
Today, I'm so bad at parking that I saw the guy next to me openly cringe as I pulled into a spot. FML
Today, I was working as a valet when an old guy came up and wanted us to park his car. He said he had an accident. We looked in the car and saw poop all over the seat. We still had to park the car. FML
Today, while working at my truck stop, I helped a trucker check his tires. He seemed like a pretty nice guy, and we chatted for a bit. After he took off and I walked back inside, I went to clean the shower he was in before. Turns out he took a shit on the floor. His wife had been in there with him. FML
Today, I was sitting under a tree at a park. The dirt felt a little damp, so I assumed it was dew from the night. A homeless man walks over and asks me to move, then starts to pee under the tree, followed by another man. I was sitting in their bathroom. FML
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Top comments
soiheardyoufaile 4
Ah that's just him claiming the spot, better luck next time!
hockeyrocks39 0
Did you wait? Maybe he picks up after himself. He might have had some hobo shit bags, kind of like the dog baggies and cleaned it right up for your pretty little car.
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Comments (99)
motorolja 0
Well his life is probably more ****** than yours..
CateXOX 0
Yeah, OP, his life is probably shitty. Sorry, I had to say it.
resshead 0
He was marking his territory.
Teah9 6
woops didn't see your comment
Teah9 6
he's just marking his territory :p
senechal20 1
hahahahahahahaha
rawritsgreta7 0
sounds like a shitty situation.
trixy81 10
he was constipated before and someone thought he was having a seizure
xxLifexx 0
your thoughts:"damnnn!!!" homeless guy "my property bitch!"
jess6blondie9 3
When you gotta go, you gotta go!
lexiibugg21 0
hahah (: true that !
autezz24680 2
well... that's a shitty sitation. hehehehe, see wat i there?? LOL! :)
maryrain 0
marking his territory