Today, I was having lunch and I started throwing crumbs at my friend at the other table. Then I accidentally hit the kid next to him. He got really mad and came over and hit me in the shoulder with a brick. A brick. He just had a brick in his bag. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Child labor
Today, I was dining out with friends. I saw a mom instructing her young child to go to empty tables and take whatever cash had been left. I discreetly told the manager. He confronted the woman and pointed right at me. As she was being thrown out, she tossed a very heavy mug at my head. It hit me. FML
ARE YOU ******* SORRY?
Today, I was at the park with my friends. We were all having fun on the swings, when out of nowhere I heard a thud, followed by a child crying. Turns out I accidentally kicked him in the head. FML
Smooth
Today, I was in the cafeteria at a table near the guy I like. He was playing around with a ball with a couple of his friends. They dropped it, and it rolled over next to my foot. When I bent down to pick it up, I smashed my head against a chair. FML
Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw a brick down the laundry-chute. Guess who spent the night at the hospital. FML
Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML
Today, I was at a bar with my friend, when I noticed a young lad at a table near to us. I thought it'd be funny to jeer and flick peanuts at him. I went to the restroom, only to come back to my friend face-down on the floor. Turns out the guy fucked him up instead, and now he won't talk to me. FML
Today, I tried to break up a fight between two of my coworkers. They decided to show their gratitude by smashing me in the face with a thick ceramic dish. FML
Today, I opened a cupboard and a brick fell on my head. The same brick my mum put up there to "keep it out of the way". FML
Fore!
Today, I was skating with my friends when I decided to go to the gas station to get a pack of cigs. The last thing I remember hearing was, "Look out!" I now have twenty stitches because some idiot bet he could throw a brick farther than another guy. FML
Today, one of my idiot classmates decided it was a good idea to throw his water bottle across the room to his friend. Unfortunately, I was sitting in front of his friend. I now have a very noticeable bruise and bump near my temple along with a headache. Everybody laughed at me. Even the teacher. FML
Top comments
HappyItalian 38
I have so many questions for this FML
zinoxity 23
At least it wasn't something even more life threatening. Though, yeah, that's odd of him to be carrying a brick around in his bag. Either way, who gets mad enough to get physical over being hit with food crumbs? FYL, OP. That kid overreacted.
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Comments (110)
theRonin 18
That sucks but cant be too safe nowadays. Gotta defend yourself with something XD
expertsmilee 26
For GODS SAKE, it's not of...it's have!
Silk_Routes 14
Brick Avatar'
MDoremis 38
I really enjoy the way that FML was written.
aimbug 42
1. Hope you're okay Op and he didn't do damage! 2. Why the hell would someone carry around a brick?
elektra2 16
I am sure you didn't expect THAT outcome when you sat down to have lunch.
aimbug 42
No, that was the other guy.
dragoongirl90 34
Well, that escalated quickly.
Keiraquarium 12
Major overreaction with the brick but it's so annoying when people throw food while other people are sat nearby.
spikewing 10
I'd be mad too if all I had for lunch was a brick