Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I accidentally ate a cat treat instead of a cinnamon-glazed pecan. I thought it must have been burnt by the way it tasted, so ate a few more before I figured out my mistake and spat them out. FML
Today, I made myself a snack. I took a seemingly clean plate from the sink which had been used earlier for scrambled eggs. Only after I'd made the snack did I remember I let my dog lick the plate clean. FML
Today, I discovered my cat frequently licks my toothbrush. FML
Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML
Today, I was making a nacho and grabbed some refried beans that were in a plastic container out of the fridge and put them on top of the chips. After I’m completely done eating my mom looks in the fridge and asked me if I knew where the cat food was. I just ate a small can of cat food. FML
Today, I saw some reddish-colored stuff on my finger after wiping my face. I thought it was blood at first, so I smelled it, then licked it, I don't know why the fuck I did that but anyways, I later realized I'd wiped off some of my eyeshadow and frickin ate it. FML
Today, I had just finished making myself an ice cream cone when my cat puked all over the floor. I set my cone on the counter while I cleaned up, and when I finished, my cat was licking it. FML
Today, I caught my husband and the cat licking the butter together. FML
Today, I spilled the bowl of cat food I'd just filled. I picked it all up in front of my cat, but he refused to eat any of it. I had to put the food back into the packet and fill the bowl all over again. My cat is a prince. FML
Today, I used my towel on the counter to clean my glasses. Apparently, my foster cat had peed on it during the night. The wet towel hit my mouth. I started out my day with cat pee on my lips. FML
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Top comments
PenguinBitch 43
Reminds me of that Spongebob episode where he tastes Gary's food.
GetGulley 12
The most important meal of the day, serving it up Gary's way!
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Comments (104)
saxybandgeek 14
Read this while eating. I'm done.
PenguinBitch 43
After tasting it, did you sing the Meow Mix song?
gracehi 31
I just threw up a little inside my mouth.
FizzyFun 8
Hahaha. But no seriously, gross!
kuffis 11
You and your cat are nothing but mammals with similar digestive tract evolved to keep you healthy in wide variety exceptional conditions so don't let worry stop you from doing like they do it on discovery channel.
middlenamefrank 8
Um...so what? Do you think your cat food is poisonous or something? Probably doesn't even taste too bad since it has to appeal to cats.
hellphone_fml 37
humans and cats have very different taste buds
bosox29 14
#51 totally understand where you are coming from! Field ops with no bathroom or shower 120 degree heat while looking for people in the desert you really don't get that chance to take a much needed shower everyday. Some people just don't understand that those things become a luxury while on deployment
peacejunior 12
You are what you eat op! Now you are one step closer to understand your cat. Perhaps if you do it more frequent, you will be granted a membership to the cats community.
ShyAnn29 14
51, you are exactly right!
Norvi 26
Are you sure you're not turning into a district 9 alien?