Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML
Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML
Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML
Today, it was the first day of school, and I split my pants. In a full class. While on a stage. I'm the teacher, and I wasn't wearing underwear. FML
Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML
Today, I was messing around in computer class when somebody called my name from the hall. Trying to be smooth, I tried rolling my chair backwards out into the hall. The wheels wasted no time jamming and sending me crashing face-first into the floor in front of everyone. FML
Today, I was playing ball with my student during recess. My first attempt at throwing the ball hit him in the head. My second attempt hit him in the crotch. FML
Today, I was sitting in on a boring presentation at work. I yawned and shifted in my chair, accidentally sitting on my testicles. I shrieked in pain and spent the next five minutes choking back tears, while my boss told me to shut my mouth and stop fucking around. FML
Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML
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Top comments
Not_ROFL 11
You sat on your own testicles?
Scubanaut 13
I'm missing the adventure in this situation?
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Comments (77)
Dibber 10
Now I'm a bit afraid to free ball it.
reaxion 25
Those must be some saggy old grandpa nuts you got blessed with to be able to sit on them that badly. FYL
alexnoyle 12
You must have some pretty big balls!
LostInTheZone11 29
I'm free. Free ballin' *CRUNCH*.
discocroutons 9
I honestly feel bad for OP and guys in general! Although there is a little urge to laugh at these stories, I don't have balls so I don't know your pains. It's almost every other day that my boyfriend ends up on the floor, making dying walrus noises because I was being stupid and accidentally hit, slapped, or kicked him in the nuts. Sometimes I think I'm not going to wake up the next day because I forget how "fragile" balls actually are... Whoops! :c
docphilsman 15
have fun explaining that one
KJ6 21
I do not have a pair in my possession, but it seems they can get in the way. Is sitting down without injuring them a challenge, or do most men just do it without thinking, and op needs to get a better handle on his junk?