Today, I was driving home from swim practice with my mom. I glanced over and saw my brother's hot friend, who I've been secretly in love with forever. He waved to me, and excitedly I waved back. I then heard my mom say, "You're gonna die when you see how bad you look right now." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was talking to a swimmer I just met. I saw a cute guy and whispered to her, "That guy is hot." She asked "Who?" I pointed at him. She turned to see him, then turned back to me and said "Ew, that's my brother." She went to him, whispered something. He turned around to see me and said, "EW." FML
Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying, "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML
Today, the guy I've secretly been in love with for years told me how hot my brother is. FML
Today, I got in the car with my brother, who drives all the time with his eyes glued to his phone. We stopped at a red light, it turned green. I noticed that he was still looking down and told him the car ahead was moving. I then got screamed at, saying how I'm always right, how my friends suck, and how he wished I was dead. FML
Today, I was getting picked up by my dad after I had been swimming. I saw his car, so I walked over to it, got in and started talking about how I'd seen my brother. It wasn't until after I had put my seat belt on that I realized I was talking to a complete stranger. FML
Today, I drove across two states to see my brother, who's had a history of heart problems. My mother had sent me a long e-mail saying he was on his death bed and wanted to talk to me to "get his affairs in order." When I arrived worriedly, he was fine. My mother guilt-tripped me to come visit. FML
Today, I was at Starbucks after having a rough day. The old man beside me was talking to his friend. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him point at me and say, "See that beautiful girl over there?" Flattered, I listened closer… until he finished his statement with, "She's gonna die." FML
Today, my mom walked into the bathroom while I was taking a pic to send to my long-distance boyfriend. She then told me I would go to hell for flaunting myself at guys. I was fully clothed, sending a pic to see if he liked my new haircut. That and I'm 21. FML
Today, my best friend told me he had a crush on someone in my house. I got excited, but he told me it was my mom. FML
Today, I was shopping with my dad and I saw one of my guy friends, so we waved and smiled at each other. My dad clearly thought his wave was too "romantic", because he shouted at him, "Touch her, and I'll kill you." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
thisisnotmyname 0
lol No one looks pretty after swim practice. I always looked horrid.
Megbo 0
hahaha oh well, at least he still waved?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (103)
Andy_King 0
your mom is cool, my mom's always like "oh you look wonderful!" when i wear like a stained T-shirt and laundry-day jeans that are too short for me. and he waved, so he might like you
swimfa42n 0
If you've been swimming for any length of time you know that you never look good after practice.
Silhouette_fml 0
Well... was she right?
sagittaurus 0
14's got it. If this guy cares what you look like so much, ESPECIALLY after swim practice, he's totally not worth your time. It's nice to know that he waved at you - he probably doesn't care at all. =)
Nonnag 0
Trust me, after swim practice most people look just fine.
soohungry 0
If you're on the swim team, you're probably in shape, and that's pretty attractive. Maybe he was like "Hey look there's that sexy swimming chick."
TerAki 0
It's not like she said you were ugly. She said "right now": your hair was probably disgusting and you were smiling like a damn idiot after showing how shallow you are "lol he was hawt".
peidit 0
wow ur mean
Neenertastic 0
Yeah, i agree with #48...hold onto that "right now" sista...it's not that bad...you're mom's just a retard. They can be. I think FML has rehashed every bad mom memory i've ever tried to repress...
gfindians11 0
i don't think its an FML she was just being honest, its fine.