Today, I was doing homework and I had my leg bent in a funny position. When I stood up, my hip dislocated. It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. When people ask me what happened, I have to say I dislocated my hip doing calculus. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I have such poor joints that I dislocated my hip trying to twist to wipe my own ass. FML
Today, as I was trying to get out of bed, my foot began sliding across the floor. I instinctively tried to balance myself, only for the new angle to cause my right hip to painfully and loudly dislocate, making me fall face-forward into my dresser. Back stuck in bed after three days of freedom. FML
Today, I did a series of stretches recommended to me by my physical therapist to help with my hip pain. I must've done them wrong despite following the instructions exactly because when I went shopping and my basket upended itself and spilled on the floor, I was in so much agony I couldn't squat to get it. FML
Today, I actually slipped on a banana peel, cartoon-style, breaking my kneecap and dislocating my hip. I will never hear the end of this. FML
Today, I dislocated my shoulder doing a really big stretch when I woke up. After the doctor relocated it, my dad told me I still had to do my chores. No excuses. FML
Today, my legs were really sore from working out yesterday, so it hurt going down the stairs at work. To avoid the pain, l ignored how stupid I looked and limped down the staircase. When I finally got to the bottom, I hopped off the last step. And twisted my ankle. FML
Today, I felt flexible in my yoga class. I put my legs in the butterfly position and tried to press them down. Both my hips popped very painfully and I screamed in the middle of a quiet room. FML
Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML
Today, I had a great workout and was feeling really good about my body. Until I sat on my desk, and broke it. FML
Today, I was explaining a complex work issue to my team. I moved my chair back so I could see them all. The leg of my chair went into a hole in the floor, causing it to fall over and me with it. I tried to finish explaining but everyone was laughing so hard they couldn't hear. Then they realized I couldn't get up. FML
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Top comments
Leenah_93 11
Did you get an "X-ray"?
magickitten 26
I'd rather injure myself than do calculus too....
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Comments (89)
mushroomcassette 21
Newton would be proud :')
bnorb 8
Calculus so hard, it hurts.
santosb1 11
I think that is a valid excuse for hip dislocation. Calculus hurts me too, I just don't know where until it happens.
davisjenny81 30
I dislocated my shoulder at the same time I stabbed my eye with a bow on accident in Orchestra once
hippodankamus 22
OP's crush: "How did you dislocate your hip?" OP: "Yeah, I got mugged by like twenty ninjas, but they were no match. One managed to get a pretty good kick in, though."
Repethetic 25
another calculus innuendo on the horizon? why is maths considered the sexiest subject? because I don't know anybody who hasn't looked at a maths textbook and not said "**** me!"
zimgirl 18
oh man, I've had the same exact thing happen to me, by far the most pain I've ever felt.
The_Skittish_One 27
Oh no, this is possible? Now I'm going to be afraid of accidentally sitting in a weird position for too long XD
kieralumina 30
this is why you straighten out and stretch first. hopefully you feel better soon, OP
Deku_Cutie 12
why did you bend it in a funny position?