By MyLegsHurt - United States - San Francisco Today, I felt flexible in my yoga class. I put my legs in the butterfly position and tried to press them down. Both my hips popped very painfully and I screamed in the middle of a quiet room. FML I agree, your life sucks 22639 You deserved it 3805 50 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Scared - United States - Pacific Today, I fell asleep while watching the Ted Bundy documentary. I'm a woman, home alone, in Seattle. The nightmares were so scary, I may never want to sleep again. FML I agree, your life sucks 1625 You deserved it 721 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By iusedprotectionanyway - New Zealand - Waitakere Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML I agree, your life sucks 44010 You deserved it 3488 77 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Lonelyhopeful Today, I was driving in a busy area looking for a place to park. I happened to lock eyes with a really handsome man who was walking alongside the road. He approached my car with a huge, gorgeous smile, and as I rolled my window down he asked, "Are you my Uber?" FML I agree, your life sucks 8519 You deserved it 945 24 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 18/8/2020 17:11 Get rid of the evidence! Today, while my roommate was taking a bath, I became horribly sick out of nowhere. Since the bathroom was occupied, I ended up having explosive diarrhea in an Amazon box in my bedroom, which I immediately ran out to the dumpster. FML I agree, your life sucks 1531 You deserved it 131 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By wtf - United States Today, my ex girlfriend that I still love sent me a text, quote "I still love you, but i'm not IN love with you" Um, what? FML I agree, your life sucks 28499 You deserved it 3594 111 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By zzfreakshow - United States - San Francisco Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around my junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML I agree, your life sucks 44728 You deserved it 5007 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my baby-crazy mother expressed her concerns that I haven't conceived after a whole two months of marriage. Her advice amounted to "get divorced while you're still hot, sleep around until you get pregnant, then marry the winner." When I complained to my father, he supported her. FML I agree, your life sucks 38929 You deserved it 3149 102 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By AccioBucket - 12/2/2021 11:02 Overreach Today, I'm banned from the only working bathroom in my house because my mother is cleansing for an upcoming colonoscopy. My options are either a bucket in the basement, or wetting myself. FML I agree, your life sucks 798 You deserved it 73 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Pissed - United States - Newton Center Today, at a family reunion, we all squeezed in for a picture. I set the self-timer and ran to get in it. 2 seconds before the picture went off, some guy came up, stole the camera, and ran away. FML I agree, your life sucks 29311 You deserved it 2490 89 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 19/12/2020 01:04 - Iraq - Basrah Leeches Today, I found out that if my husband and I move to another country to live, then his mom and sister will live with us too. I'm already living with them because of societal traditions. I like them and everything, but I really need some privacy. FML I agree, your life sucks 849 You deserved it 287 5 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By little_star78 - United States - Bloomfield Hills Today, I tried to put the little girl I babysit in timeout for lying to me. I was about to sit her down when she made a mad dash for the basement stairs, slipped on the wood floor, and fell down them. She told her parents and everyone at the ER that I had thrown her down the stairs. FML I agree, your life sucks 60048 You deserved it 3586 124 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Unlucky - Australia - Cairns Today, I realized that at 20 years old I already have noticeable wrinkles around my eyes. But to balance it out, my chronic acne keeps me looking youthful. FML I agree, your life sucks 32851 You deserved it 3005 55 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Unsatisfied - Canada Today, I found the only man who hates sex. He's my boyfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 29911 You deserved it 4641 167 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Jenbearish Today, the laziest person in my department came and complained to me, while I was working, that they didn't know why we were so far behind today. Then they went to chat to their friend for 45 minutes. I know why. FML I agree, your life sucks 15731 You deserved it 1055 33 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By awkwardRA Today, one of my residents was having super loud sex. I'm an RA in a college freshman dorm, and I had to knock on her door and tell her to quiet down. I hate to be a cock-block, but she woke multiple people up, myself included. I live 4 doors down the hall from her. FML I agree, your life sucks 3703 You deserved it 414 24 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Distrusting Today, I have gastro. I sent a text my husband: “It’s definitely a don’t trust a fart day, thankfully haven’t been caught out yet”, but accidentally text my manager instead. FML I agree, your life sucks 2181 You deserved it 916 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Dee - United States Today, I was at a party at the house of the guy I really like. We were talking when he pulled me into his room. I was excited he was finally taking our friendship to the next level, until he handed me a stick of deodorant, saying "I didn't wanna tell you in the hallway, but you really need this." FML I agree, your life sucks 45992 You deserved it 21947 115 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By agnosticstudy - United States Today, I met a woman that I've been emailing and trading pics with for over a month. We had a face to face, she was surprisingly overweight, and the sun hit her face in a way that radiated all her facial hair. FML I agree, your life sucks 12260 You deserved it 28750 53 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Noname - United Kingdom Today, my brother had his fiancée over to meet the whole family. We were having a great time with her, and my mother gushed to her that she was like the daughter she never had. I'm her daughter. FML I agree, your life sucks 64192 You deserved it 2979 71 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Dover Today, I was helping my Grandfather to sort through tubs and bins after cleaning out his attic, and I had to move a 50lb bin downstairs. That's when the dog thought it would be funny to block the top of the stairs as I was going down. FML I agree, your life sucks 12589 You deserved it 983 23 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By TheVirginJenny - United States - Spanaway Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML I agree, your life sucks 32825 You deserved it 7721 195 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By a chick in California - United States - Ceres Today, all my guy friends kept hugging me tightly and then softly and then tightly again. I later found out they just wanted to feel my boobs on their chests. FML I agree, your life sucks 35085 You deserved it 8654 277 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ~JESSICA~ - United States Today, I woke up late to an urgent voicemail from my dad telling me he left me a present in my car. Excited, I went to investigate. I then saw that his "surprise" was fresh fish he had caught. I hate fish, and now my car stinks. FML I agree, your life sucks 26793 You deserved it 3587 91 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ripped - United States - Philadelphia Today, my cat used my head as a springboard and ripped my earring out with her claw. FML I agree, your life sucks 13742 You deserved it 1349 38 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By YOU KNOW WHAT, FUCK THE CUSTOMER - United States - Sherwood Today, at work, a woman came up to the snack bar and ordered a pretzel with no salt. When I served her the food, she angrily complained about it having no salt, followed by her throwing the whole thing in my face. FML I agree, your life sucks 51111 You deserved it 3449 86 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Meridian Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML I agree, your life sucks 57167 You deserved it 5028 93 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By no compassion - United States - Aurora Today, working in customer support, I received a call from a woman who'd just been robbed. My supervisor asked what was taking so long; I told him that she was hysterical. He took my phone and told her to call back when she had her "shit together", then hung up. I take orders from this man. FML I agree, your life sucks 45238 You deserved it 4002 71 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By yosmurf Smooth. Today, I finished taking a huge dump at the public restroom at the mall. When I got up to wipe, my wrist clipped my butt and knocked my brand new Apple Watch into the toilet. FML I agree, your life sucks 2052 You deserved it 1159 22 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By njh - Ireland Today, my 3-year-old son said to me, "Fuck a duck, Daddy." I have no idea where he heard this. FML I agree, your life sucks 32190 You deserved it 3573 99 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Sarah - United States Today, my mom barged into my room at three in the morning, demanding to know where I'd been. I'd been in my room sleeping since ten o'clock. In that time she had called the police, all of my friends, and my ex-boyfriend, asking if I was with them. FML I agree, your life sucks 39157 You deserved it 2458 73 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Heartbroken - Australia Today, I have to be at work with a smile on my face, whilst sitting next to the asshole that dumped me last week. FML I agree, your life sucks 25244 You deserved it 5592 33 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By plasticfantastic - United Kingdom Today, I met this guy I really liked at a party. We got chatting and then hit the dance floor. We had a "moment" and I went in to kiss him. He shot forward with his tongue already out. His eyes were open. FML I agree, your life sucks 52615 You deserved it 9598 151 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pissedoffandon - United Kingdom Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML I agree, your life sucks 15902 You deserved it 61668 95 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By whygod Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old sister, naked, streaming herself eating a banana. FML I agree, your life sucks 18200 You deserved it 1382 140 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By firstandlastjob - 13/6/2020 14:11 Make it stop Today, at work I had to listen to a group of old men talk about double penetration. I work at a coffee shop. FML I agree, your life sucks 1680 You deserved it 183 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Lexi - France Today, after telling my best friend an idiot could make Kraft Dinner, I spilled boiling water all over my hands and forearms while attempting to strain the noodles. FML I agree, your life sucks 8186 You deserved it 36140 51 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pinkblankets - United States Today, I woke up with really dry, chapped lips. Still in bed, without my glasses on, I sleepily reached down into my purse for some chapstick and applied it. Upon awakening later I realized I had mistaken a mini Sharpie permanent marker for chapstick. I have a job interview today. FML I agree, your life sucks 49005 You deserved it 29806 160 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anon - United States - Toledo Today, I got into a car accident. The other driver was going so fast that when we hit, our cars positioned themselves to make it look like it was all my fault. He keeps blaming me for everything and the position of the cars doesn't help. FML I agree, your life sucks 22601 You deserved it 1462 75 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada - Toronto Today, I discovered that my acne glows yellow and orange under black lights while in front of a wall of them at a club. FML I agree, your life sucks 26318 You deserved it 2689 139 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FirstDaddy - United States - Southfield Today, my daughter told me that she liked her "other daddy" better. I don't know who's she talking about, but my wife is doing a good job telling her to be quiet. FML I agree, your life sucks 63159 You deserved it 4450 134 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By khorstmye | 15 #6447653 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:21 Your hips don't lie Send a private message 242 3 Reply
By Welshite | 39 #6447646 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:17 Yoga is all about yielding. It's goes against the very principle of yoga to force your body into a position it's not ready for. Send a private message 231 5 Reply
By jx88 | 14 #6447645 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:17 Hope you are all right OP! That sounds painful. Send a private message 44 4 Reply
By Welshite | 39 #6447646 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:17 Yoga is all about yielding. It's goes against the very principle of yoga to force your body into a position it's not ready for. Send a private message 231 5 Reply
Reply walker9879 | 25 #6448082 - Thursday 29 October 2015 21:31 I thought you said yelling and I laughed much more then when I realized it said yielding. Send a private message 15 1 Reply
By arano | 29 #6447647 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:18 All I can say to this one is FYL. Send a private message 4 46 Reply
Reply XxDanno316xX | 27 #6447678 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:58 You could just push the button mate. Send a private message 65 3 Reply
Reply arano | 29 #6448314 - Friday 30 October 2015 3:53 You could've just agreed instead of being a douche. Send a private message 5 16 Reply
By xxlittlemsanime | 24 #6447650 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:18 Shit! I can feel the pain. Don't push yourself until something hurts. Send a private message 23 2 Reply
By Geek_Freak | 13 #6447651 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:18 Are you ok? It sounds very painful. I hope you feel better. ☺️ Send a private message 9 6 Reply
By khorstmye | 15 #6447653 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:21 Your hips don't lie Send a private message 242 3 Reply
Reply vikky538 | 28 #6447690 - Thursday 29 October 2015 13:50 It only cry Send a private message 8 16 Reply
Reply Nickiminajislyfe | 20 #6448570 - Friday 30 October 2015 13:36 That's just evil Send a private message 0 3 Reply
By Queensland | 27 #6447656 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:24 Yoga to be kidding me. Send a private message 54 3 Reply
By RainbowLibster | 17 #6447657 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:24 I'm sure that nobody blamed you for screaming OP. Hope you feel better soon :( Send a private message 11 1 Reply
By Livin_Like_Larry | 29 #6447659 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:30 Just to sure, I would check with a doctor. Better safe than sorry. Send a private message 15 2 Reply
By 2C0OL4SCH0OL | 17 #6447661 - Thursday 29 October 2015 12:31 Yoga is for revealing stress you shouldn't force yourself to do something painful and you should try to have fun OP Send a private message 17 3 Reply
Today, I finally got pulled into a threesome with the girl I've loved for years and another friend. She led the interaction with, "You only get to touch... I agree, your life sucks 130 You deserved it 27 1 Comments
Today, my boyfriend is once again mad at me because I refused to have shower sex with him. I’m too embarrassed to explain to him that ever since I could... I agree, your life sucks 390 You deserved it 97 9 Comments