Miscellaneous: Today, I was at my boyfriend's house when I got a call from my...

By potheadloljk - 02/12/2012 02:01 - United States - East Machias

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house when I got a call from my parents. They told me to come home immediately. Panicking, I rushed home. My dad pulled out a clear tube filled with dried leaves. They accused me of having marijuana. It was catnip for my kitten. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 296

You deserved it 2 124

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Same thing different taste

By Mellamononeyobiz - 13/01/2016 02:10 - United States - Hooper

Today, my mom smoked pot in my sister's bedroom while I was at school. When I noticed the stench, she blamed the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 145

You deserved it 1 628

Stoner

By Alyssa - 13/02/2012 00:01 - United States

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 847

You deserved it 83 189

Don't harsh our buzz, filthy human

By Ubehage - 06/01/2023 03:00 - Denmark

Today, I bought a huge 1kg bag of catnip and told the delivery driver to just leave the package inside the door. They then left me a soft plastic bag full of catnip. Guess who came home to two stoned cats and a messed up house… FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 1 078

By Anonymous - 16/08/2019 06:00

Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 687

You deserved it 2 619

By lehonX9 - 06/06/2015 09:11 - Germany - Hanover

Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 789

You deserved it 9 717

By a critically injured shitehawk - 25/04/2015 10:34 - United Kingdom - York

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 195

You deserved it 3 019

By ugh - 01/12/2015 03:52 - Canada - Lethbridge

Today, my mother went through my bag and found what she thought was rolling papers. I was yelled at and called a stupid pothead with no future. They were facial blotting papers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 647

You deserved it 1 563

By Fucked - 16/01/2009 19:38 - United States

Today, my dog found my marijuana pipe and the bag it was in and brought it to my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 551

You deserved it 40 815

By allykat - 03/12/2014 00:56 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I bought my cat a fun toy at the one of a kind craft show. It has catnip in it, which he loves. He flipped out, so I took it away. He won't stop trying to break into the cupboard I put it in. My cat has a drug problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 305

You deserved it 5 709

Smoke 'em if you've got 'em

By Dumbweed - 28/08/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, my mom told me she was getting tired of the smell of marijuana in the house. So I confessed and told her I'll never bring it home again. She was talking about my neighbors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 254

You deserved it 67 710

DocBastard 38

Sunday 2 December 2012 11:15

Catnip is just the start! It's a gateway herb for cats. Next thing you know, he'll be sneaking out at 2AM to score some blow from the cat down the street. That's when he starts knocking over garbage cans looking for his next score. Before you know it he's lost in a swirling maelstrom of despair and soggy cat treats. Cut him off now before its too late!

blcksocks 19

Sunday 2 December 2012 11:03

Tell them your kitten is hooked on weed.

Comments

ayetunechi3 6

Sunday 2 December 2012 18:18

lol look at his username !

ninjacow123 6

Sunday 2 December 2012 18:51

The fact that they think dried leaves looks like marijuana is just sad...

rintintin19 5

Sunday 2 December 2012 18:55

catnip...hmmmm...thanks OP that's good, i'll remember that!

zebrapattern 6

Sunday 2 December 2012 18:55

why do you keep catnip in a clear tube?

evilplatypus 38

Sunday 2 December 2012 19:08

It often comes like that. Some catnip toys have replaceable catnip and a tube makes it easier to pour into the toy.

verkaderk 9

Sunday 2 December 2012 18:58

Put THAT in your pipe and smoke it!

octopussperm125 18

Wednesday 5 December 2012 0:00

Theres an old myth that katnip can get high similar to how a person get high from smoking inscence like it was bud

knmoon 8

Sunday 2 December 2012 19:17

Smart people these days -___-

ratorr2 23

Sunday 2 December 2012 19:22

I know it sucks but it sounds like they are just trying to be good parents. For all those who ask "don't they smell different?", yes they do but not to someone who has never smelled them before. I have a feeling her parents have never smelled them before (or didn't smell what's in the tube) or else they wouldn't be panicking. You have to admit "a clear tube filled with dried leaves" does look kind of suspicious. As much as it sucks, I think her parents did the right thing. The question is did they believe her when she informed them that it was catnip?

OfficeNinja 5

Sunday 2 December 2012 22:29

Perfect! Now you have a great cover story for your real weed! It's catnip!

timanddavelive 4

Sunday 2 December 2012 22:42

I think it's about time to move out on your own isn't it?

hellonyancat 6

Sunday 2 December 2012 23:16

They should have known when the cat came running when they opened it. My cat comes running if I even move the jar. Oh well, I guess no real harm done. Now you can get some real marijuana and put it in the catnip tube. It's the last thing they'll expect!