Love: Today, I was at lunch with my girlfriend. The waitress came up...

By Anonymous - 29/09/2009 19:09 - United States

Today, I was at lunch with my girlfriend. The waitress came up and asked for her number, then asked if she had a significant other. I laughed as my girlfriend gave the waitress her number. They're going on a date, tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 845

You deserved it 7 163

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 24/09/2013 07:15 - United States - Petrolia

Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 031

You deserved it 3 421

By awkward - 26/09/2016 21:31 - United States - Oakland

Today, I was out to dinner with a friend I had a crush on. The whole time, he was flirting with the waitress while I was trying to get him to notice me. When we got the check, he looked at her and said, "She's not my girlfriend, I only go out with pretty girls. So, can I have your number?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 031

You deserved it 1 380

Having multiple jobs may have its benefits

By Scoudrel - 26/02/2021 17:01

Today, I flirted with the cashier at the local bagel joint. I complimented her unique blue hair and got her number. Later on that evening, she served my girlfriend and me our food at a different restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 6 410

By unloved - 17/04/2012 14:54 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. When it came time for us to leave, I saw him write something on the receipt for our waitress. I managed to get a quick look; it was his number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 757

You deserved it 2 751

Pleased to meet you

By footinmouth - 13/09/2009 05:14 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 021

You deserved it 14 117

By Anonymous - 13/03/2013 23:22 - United States

Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 425

You deserved it 4 330

You IDIOT

By A.L.Woody - 11/08/2009 06:42 - United States

Today, I was approached by the head cheerleader, and she asked for my number. I was so excited that I gave it to her without question. Then she smiled, and walked away. Too bad my girlfriend was right behind me when it happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 800

You deserved it 113 206

By mynameisarmpit - 15/11/2010 06:48

Today, I went out to eat with my girlfriend. The waiter came up and was being nice. He said, "What can I get you two gentlemen?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 741

You deserved it 4 673

By Anon - 28/01/2019 06:00 - United States - West Jefferson

Today, my girlfriend and I went on a date. I went to the bathroom. When I came back, she was sitting at a different table flirting with a guy that looked twice as old as her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 582

You deserved it 247

By Anonymous - 01/05/2009 11:36 - United States

Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 047

You deserved it 5 371

Arcterion 0

Wednesday 30 September 2009 1:33

Dump her ass. Clearly she does not care about you.

UpYourself 0

Wednesday 30 September 2009 1:33

Can anybody say......threesome

Comments

Kay_Noelle 11

Monday 22 April 2013 5:51

Lesbihonest here, just dump her. She didn't seem to care about you anyways when she started writing her number. You'll find someone better!

captaincrazy_x 8

Tuesday 23 July 2013 0:17

Three way ?

Elizabeth_Scholt 18

Tuesday 26 November 2013 5:12

So sorry. :( That's so mean and heartless of your girlfriend to do. You can do so much better, and you deserve respect! Xo I hope you're okay, miss.

bronx2713 10

Tuesday 31 December 2013 6:55

Waitress? So she's also coming out of the closet?

Emmy2086 9

Monday 9 June 2014 2:39

maybe they'll let you watch when they get home?? ;)

justwanttocoment 2

Saturday 5 July 2014 4:59

That pisses me off that bitch

Lunab123 16

Sunday 18 January 2015 18:54

Thats when you speak up

bde1015 7

Friday 7 August 2015 17:24

I would have dumped her on the spot wtf

iMuffinKat 16

Saturday 23 January 2016 17:24

Or maybe OP just has a real big crush on a friend and just thinks they're dating.

kevingirl 6

Sunday 1 October 2017 1:37

Are you sure she's your girlfriend? does she know it??

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The Top

Today, my grandmother died. No one called me to let me know she passed. I found out because people kept writing RIP on her Facebook wall. My siblings and I weren't even mentioned in her obituary with the other grandchildren, but they did remember to mention her dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 792

You deserved it 2 638

Today, I started doing cardio at my local gym with a basic exercise bike because doing weightlifting by itself wasn't having an effect on my weight. Since I'm out of shape, I did 15 minutes instead of the standard 30. I had to stop at 10 minutes because my legs were so sore they nearly gave out on me when I stood up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 339

You deserved it 153

Today, my girlfriend slapped me and dumped me because she thought I was gay, simply because I had to miss a date because one of my guy friends was in a car accident, and I went to see him at the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 236

You deserved it 134

Today, I was walking down the street and saw a man trip over a sign. He then grabbed his cane, started screaming, and began beating the sign. Apparently that didn't release his anger, so he began to beat the nearest car. I thought it was hilarious, until I noticed it was my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 228

You deserved it 10 261

Today, after sex, my boyfriend and I lay in bed for a couple of hours just chatting. This would have been lovely. However, his topic of choice for post-coital pillow talk was his theory about how Chewbacca is secretly the leader of the Rebel Alliance. It actually made sense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 255

You deserved it 7 705

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 121

You deserved it 20 596

Same thing different taste

Having multiple jobs may have its benefits

Pleased to meet you

You IDIOT

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