By Khrixas_069 - 18/06/2011 07:10 - United States

Today, I was about to make love to my girlfriend at the local park when a cop caught us. I had to give him our information and hold a conversation with "Fire and Ice" lubricant on my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks 16 721
You deserved it 58 642

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Looks like this conversation wasn't too "hot" or too "cool"

Luciens19 0


Looks like this conversation wasn't too "hot" or too "cool"

sarahxD1234 5

just the right temperature. but seriously YDI .

did the cop want a threesome? hopefully you had spare lube for him :)

did the cop want a threesome? hopefully you had spare lube for him :)

zakkyzebra 11

It wasn't any funnier the second time. (Yes I'm aware it was an FML double post error.)

Then why call someone out over something they had no control over?

Andrew1122 0
extrovertical 0

Local park you say?? How classy.

OP only resorted to the local park because the classy alley behind the gas station was "occupied." (;

Your hot and your cold, your up and your down, your in and your out.

a_nutritionist 10

@148 theres no way you can claim that was a typo...*YOU'RE. learn the difference.

Learn the difference between "helping" and being a "douche" then maybe you'll get somewhere in life, like out of your moms basement for example.

a_nutritionist 10

wow thats original. my mums basement. yeah. if i had a cent for every time i heard someone talk about my mums non existent basement id have...well...probably like 20 cents.

Good job! Feel like you could go chase the world huh? Well too bad you have no people skills!

a_nutritionist 10

"Learn the difference between "helping" and being a "douche" then maybe you'll get somewhere in life"

Yes but I understand I was being a douche. You do not

182, for whatever reason you found it necessary to correct me on my grammar, I will now return the favor and let you know that you forgot to put a period. Also, I know the difference between "your" and "you're," however, seeing as this is FML, not an English class, I do not understand why you really give a shit, due to the fact you obviously understood what I was saying.

a_nutritionist 10

difference being, mine doesnt change the entire meaning of whats being said, isnt a common error made by idiots who actually dont know the difference and wasnt repeated several times in one message. sure, you keep pretending the only place where sentences need to make sense is in an english class, ill continue to know otherwise. theres a clear difference between being lazy and being stupid, i skip over things like capitals and apostrophes, thats lazy, you type the wrong word in a sentence, thats stupid.

extrovertical 0

"mine doesn't change the entire meaning of what's being said" uh yeah it does, hence the difference between your and you're.

201- skipping over apostrophes actually does change the meaning... In other words, YOU'RE wrong.

148 Right in more ways than the song lyrics

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We all know you would, but what would he do? Well, coming to a logical conclusion that person would have a conversation with the cop naked and with lubrication on his penis. Sounds like somethin he would do. So in better terms he should, but it would make him homosexual which, I doubt he is.

we all know you would... over there holding your boob and taking a picture of it *rolls eyes*

HAHAHA you didn't put on some pants before talking to him?

putting on pants wouldn't affect the lubricant lol

what do u expect from a 15 yr old retarded Canadian boy with a black womans picture

u like your constipated do the constipated dance!!!!

That was probably the stupidest comment I have ever read

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Hello_kitty_love_fml 0

ikr who does that? Geez, keep your package closed in public places... theres children in the park.

agaba 0

thats just weird and go to ur house to do it

DaleksAreEpic 0

funny becaus this kid is like 12, what a joke. and every comment replying to him is referring to his young age. Avengers Unite

randomguy1millon_fml 0

yeah #6 I was about to compliment you on this comment and then I saw your pic and realized you were 5 and now I'm kinds rethinking things...

Honestly its not really that weird some people get excitement from there adrenaline pumping. (adrenaline junkies) And yes pumping pun intended.

is it safe to say you're in hot water?

Very unsafe, in fact, if you ever get into hot water, jump out immediately!! It may leave permanent damage.

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Why are you getting on the man about using lube? Considering it was Fire and Ice, it was probably just something they wanted to try out. Have you had a bad experience with lube? :(

I love dumb people, I love you, coincidence? I'd think not! Either way for God sakes man have you ever had fire and ice!? IT BURNS WHILE IT FREEZES! The first person who tried it probably wasn't the smartest person on the planet if you think about it.

Just because he's using lube doesn't mean she cant get wet. It also doesn't mean he doesn't care about her. There are other reasons for lube.

DawnMarie11 0

it's not lube it's a condom. sheesh.

niswisk 3

it might be the girl dude. some chicks just dont get wet enough. neither of them at fault

IAmTheHeavens 0

Your retarded. People can use different types of lube for the sensation it gives not just for being able to pull in and out smoothly. Your obviously a virgin.

LittlexSparrow 0

It does come separate from the condom..and maybe they're using lube so that his man thang doesn't gain friction and rip apart. its happened to people before!!

I think he was referring to the lube thats already on the Trojan Fire & Ice condom that he probably had on

I agree with 49, cause honestly if you're questioning why the guy was using lube, you obviously haven't had enough sex or are in fact a virgin

randomguy1millon_fml 0

dude so u don't get the girl pergnant

MerrikBarbarian 9

gonna assume you are a virgin here, or are a terrible lover. either way- how much lube a girl produces has jack all to do with how aroused she is. where she is in her cycle plays into it big time, as well as her natural body rythyms. a girl can be super turned on, but dry as the sahara, or super wet, but not turned on at all. actually learn some anatomy and biology instead of getting your info from ****.

12345goochgobble 0

you my friend are an idiot

ReynshineCutting 10

Moron. You must be a virgin. My fiancé and I use lube all the time. Does it mean we just wanna jam it in and get it over with? No. It feels good and can make things easier sometimes.

Imma just say youre ******* retarded...

MasterShake1100 0
MasterShake1100 0

Next time you shouldn't rape homeless people sleeping in parks. Who does it in parks anyways.