Today, I tried to fight my girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend because she told me he used to beat her. Turns out, she was lying to “impress” me, and her ex has a black belt in taekwondo. I’m in excruciating pain right now. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML
Today, I tried to win back my ex by fighting her current boyfriend. He kicked my ass. Now I have a broken jaw and a court date. FML
Today, my sister told me her ex-boyfriend abused her and I went to go confront him. Turns out, she lied because he dumped her after she cheated on him. I got my ass kicked. FML
Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML
Today, while out with my girlfriend, her stalker ex-boyfriend appeared out of nowhere and beat the shit out of me. While I was on the ground, my girlfriend got angry at him, and went to go “talk with him in private.” She’s nowhere to be found, and hasn’t picked up her phone in four hours. FML
Today, while I was out walking with my girlfriend, I got beaten up and called an "abuser" by a gang of women who noticed bruises on my girlfriend's arms and legs. The bruises are from her karate class. FML
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
Today, I argued with a boy from school over a girl. I didn't know he was a black belt judoka. I'm still in pain. FML
Today, the girl I thought I was dating got into a fight with me over the phone. She did this because she bet her boyfriend that she could make me cry on FaceTime. She won the bet. FML
Today, I found out my girlfriend of 3 years has been cheating on me. When I explained the situation to the "other guy", he exclaimed that I was lying because I was jealous and trying to ruin his relationship. He punched me in the face. FML
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Top comments
PhantomCrevan 8
By "tried to fight" you mean you attempted to assault someone? While it's commendable that you wanted what you thought was payback for your (hopefully ex) girlfriend, you are lucky you only got your ass kicked. You could have faced criminal charges over this. More importantly, you NEED to dump that bitch- not only did she lie about something as important as abuse, but she apparently did so just for the attention. If she was willing to accuse him of abuse, she's going to be willing to accuse you of abuse- quite possibly while you are still dating- for attention and revenge for a disagreement.
RichardPencil 32
One word about seeking revenge without knowing 100% that you can beat the victim: Taekwondon’t!
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Comments (21)
pjsr 33
This is great. If she thought getting beaten would impress you, then she must be super impressed after the beating you took!
Talis99 26
So, are you incapable of understanding the reality of the situation, or...?
Talis99 26
So, now she's your ex, too, right? And you've apologized to the other guy?
onceuponatime456 16
Get rid of the bitch!
Razell 13
hmm... Yeah drop the girl ASAP. Keep tabs on her though: you can expect her to lie to her next boyfriend about you beating her, and it would be good for you to have some warning when he come to beat you up.
kristinjeaneen 21
Okay any woman who thinks lying about an abusive relationship is “impressive” deserves to be single. Please tell me you broke up with her.
sharond23 10
I'm confused as to why being beaten by an ex would impress you. she sounds like a. idiot.
Brightbulb 40
She needs to go out of your life and get counseling, that is not something a "normal" girl would do. Run far, far away. I would also tell the ex what she said, who knows who else she told (he doesn't deserve to be whispered about without knowing why, and deserves to know why you tried to get violent). Then look at yourself and decide why you would decide violence was the answer to what probably happened before you had even met her, rather than comforting her and supporting her through what would be a difficult time for any survivor. I wish you the best man.