Today, I tried to be seductive to get intimate with my boyfriend. He commented on how sexy I looked, and how badly he wanted me, then asked me to move because I was blocking the TV, and the World Cup match he was watching. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML
Today, I turned off my boyfriend's Xbox while he was playing because I wanted to talk to him about getting more serious with our relationship. As I did so, he said, "That's not the only thing you just turned off" and promptly broke up with me. FML
Today, my husband and I were talking about celebrities he finds attractive. All of these beautiful, talented, glamorous women were starting to make me feel very plain, so he attempted to console me by saying, "But I love you. You're attainable!" FML
Today, while sitting next to me, my boyfriend sent a text to one of his "friends" saying, "I'm thinking of you." FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend on our couch. Meanwhile, my parents came to visit us without telling me. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped by my house after work because he missed me. We made out for a bit outside, which involved some touching and then he left. When I got inside, I got a Facebook message from my older neighbor that read, "That was gross. Please don't do that again in front of me. Really." FML
Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML
Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with the guy I like. He couldn't get it up and awkwardly tried to stick his limp penis in. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 2 years told me he had feelings for someone else. He also told me he wanted to continue dating me until things progressed further with the other woman. FML
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Top comments
joefrazier 20
Well... It is the World Cup.
LotsOfConfusion 9
Something tells me that an infinite number of women an relate to this FML these days!
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Comments (164)
Daveyboy75 11
Just wait until the match finishes
audreyalves 11
I feel your pain... Happened to me too...
daddysgirl8 21
I guess you weren't sexy enough.
Tannasgh 22
Um...he has his priorities all wrong.
Chibi_Kitten 24
No... Maybe he didn't record the program...I would totally understand if a guy did that to me. It's not every year that there is a World Cup.
sybe112 14
world cup ... well that sucks for you .. I mean World Championship football yeah I can imagine but that c'mon
cannonman1863 17
It's been an exciting World Cup. I'd keep watching even if my house was on fire.
irretaklove 7
at least he acknowledged you just wait til the end of the game or offer you guys have a little fun on the couch than he can watch the game and you get what you want :)
Chibi_Kitten 24
He was trying to butter you up so that you wouldn't get as irritated. Beware flattery...
charmsfml 1
Sigh men and sports! But yea you should've found a better time!
Asstarotte 7
Hey girl you half to know nobody gets between a sports lover and thier World Cup, I'm a woman and when my bf gets in the way mm i put my foot down