Miscellaneous: Today, I told my boyfriend that I loved his flaming red hair....

By Snowin2007 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I loved his flaming red hair. He told me that he loved the fuzz on my butt. FML

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Miscellaneous

This Charming Man

You can't win

On a leash

By Rainydaze - United States - Hillsboro

Today, the guy I hooked up with last summer who was "going through a divorce" welcomed his new baby with his loving wife. FML

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By poophead - Philippines

Today, I went to a fancy beauty parlor to prepare for my sister's birthday party. The minute I stepped out of the salon, with my hair beautifully trimmed and curled, a bird decided to use it as a toilet. FML

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29675

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By tillybonkers

Today, I helped a guy in a flaming car by busting his window to get him out. I didn't realize until after the crash scene was cleared, that I didn't just have his blood on me, but I also had cut from the window. Round 3 of aids testing here I come. FML

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3045

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By wtf - United States

Today, I was on my girlfriend's computer. When searching on google, her browsing history popped up. The first thing was "Best positions for a small penis." FML

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91829

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By Anonymous - 29/9/2020 05:02

Life of Brian

Today, I never wanted a wife, so of course I got married. I never wanted kids, so of course my unwanted wife insisted we have two. My mother-in-law, who I wish daily would get hit by a bus, just got hired at my workplace. My only pleasure in life is fishing and my kids just broke my only rod. FML

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650

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4012

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By GeneralElement - United States

Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML

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30825

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By Gayeveryday - Canada - Truro

Today, I came out to my parents. They still think I'm joking. FML

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32379

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By *SuperCringe*

Today, I was matched with my boss on Tinder. FML

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3092

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953

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By Anonymous

Today, they played Nickelback at our school dance. FML

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3295

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1437

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By Milly - United Kingdom

Today, I was trying to help a very slow-witted client over the phone. After a while, I realised he was just delaying while pleasuring himself to the sound of my voice. FML

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38460

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By atsukobo - United States

Today, I was half asleep and tried to cuddle my husband as we slept. Still dreaming, he yelled for me to leave his money alone. FML

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26592

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By Anonymous

Today, as I was jogging on the boardwalk, an old guy tripped me with his cane. As I was getting back up, I heard him say to his wife, "I wanted to see if she would actually fall." FML

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1857

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110

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By Anon - United States

Today, I messaged my sister on Facebook chat. We always start our conversations with "HEY SLUT" or "HEY WHORE" etc. It wasn't my sister. However, her boyfriend's mom has a great first impression of me. FML

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11038

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By lloydLO - United States

Today, I met and asked a cute girl out on a date. We decided to meet at a fancy restaurant downtown. When I got there I saw her sitting with what turned out to be her parents. They made a huge scene, calling me a pedophile and a low-life. Apparently, the girl was 16 years old. I'm 25. FML

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39927

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By Anonymous - Australia

Today, I discovered the top I'm wearing becomes completely see-through when it rains. I just got caught in a storm on my lunch break, and still have 3 hours of work to go in my male dominated office. FML

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27471

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By Anonymous

Today, I found out that my husband only dated me because I look like what he thought the daughter he had with his first wife might look like when she's grown up. FML

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2208

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146

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By lovekills99 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she had fantasies about throwing him out a window when he was a baby because she was so depressed and couldn't handle the stress. The worst part is he wants to get married. She'd be my mother-in-law. FML

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23592

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By Anonymous. - United States

Today, the guy I've been texting told me he loved me and he couldn't wait to make me his wife, and he couldn't wait for us to have kids and grow old together. I've only known him for 3 days. FML

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33518

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By dani911 - United States

Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML

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16659

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By jaa319 - United States

Today, a customer asked for my manager's number, my bosses number, corporate's number and filled out a complaint form, all because we kindly asked him not to sit his kid on the counter due to safety concerns. FML

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10249

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By babyeaternomnom - Canada - Brampton

Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML

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27801

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2316

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By Nightmare

Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML

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45958

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at a local chinese restaurant with two of my friends. We were laughing hysterically when my friend tells me to stop making her laugh because she was going to puke, naturally I kept egging it on. She puked all over the table and I was laughing so hard that I peed my pants. FML

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11748

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By Anonymous - Canada - Kitchener

Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML

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By Anonymous - Canada

Today, I went with my friend door-to-door selling chocolates. We went to the first house, and the guy decided to buy a chocolate from each of us. He didn't have change and neither did we, so he just took the chocolates and slammed the door in our face. FML

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26833

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By Cxisbest - United States

Today, as I walked home, I heard the people behind me in an argument over my gender. FML

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44901

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By Stranded - United States

Today, I got back from a romantic vacation at a fancy hotel with my boyfriend of 6 months. After a steamy love session, I confessed that I was in love with him. Later, when I got out of the shower, all his stuff was gone and I was stuck with the entire week's hotel cost and no ride home. FML

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63747

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By damngotkik

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to use an electric sander on my arm during our construction class. FML

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4725

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373

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By single - United States - Hurricane

Today, my ex boyfriend got married to the girl he told me was his sister. FML

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37612

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3030

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By HazzaBoo - United States

Today, I decided to help the homeless by giving them old clothes and food. In return, they decided to mug me. FML

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25568

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By disgusting - United States

Today, I walked past a girl in the cafeteria and she threw up. Naturally, a crowd was drawn. Her friend asked her what was wrong. She pointed at me and said, "Get him away from me!" I had never met this girl. FML

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46478

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By davidthegreat - Japan

Today, I had to come to terms with the fact that I'm getting older because my pubic hair is turning white. FML

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38770

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By zachhewett - United States - Birmingham

Today, at my job drug testing high schoolers, I see that one of the kids selected for the testing looked incredibly high. So, after he goes in the bathroom and gives me his cup with his urine inside, I take a closer look and see that the little shit jizzed in the cup. I hate my job. FML

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27827

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By Anonymous - Philippines - Philippine

Today, I found out the fund-raiser my uncle ran to raise money for his cancer treatment was all a sham, that he doesn't even have cancer, and that the money was to fund a coke habit nobody knew he even had. FML

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34742

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By Durrrrrr - Canada

Today, I went to a "party" with the boy whom I am interested in. It was the first time I met his friends. Turns out he and all his friends are hardcore Christians who don't drink and are celibate. FML

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26013

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By DMO - United States

Today, I decided to get back into shape and go for a run. With a 1/4 mile left to run, I saw a hot chick a block ahead of me running. Trying to show off I ran hard and passed her stopping just outside my complex. I started to throw up right as she came past me because I had run so hard to pass her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10703

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By Stacy - United States

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

I agree, your life sucks

33678

You deserved it

120971

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By It's CSI Miami - United States - San Francisco

Today, I got into a fight with my mom because she believes that my fiancé is "irresponsible" and "immature". I stormed out and drove back home. There, I walked in on my fiancé and his friends. They were in a heated and almost violent argument over which CSI is the best. The wedding's next month. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24616

You deserved it

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By Anonymous - United States - West Hartford

Today, I found out the unionized cleaning people that empty the garbage and clean the toilets make $19/hr and have more paid time off than I do with my college degree. FML

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52251

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By Photoshopped - United States - Athens

Today, I sent my grandfather a picture of me because he hasn't seen me in years. I guess I should wear makeup next time, because he sent back a heavily photoshopped and cropped version and told me how beautiful I look. FML

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11319

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Top comments

By posampo | 0

#764098 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:13

Yeah well us ginges are mighty mean to fuzz butts

By paprikacha | 9

#764120 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:19

I don't know...this one is kinda cute instead of FYL. : )

COMMENTS

By posampo | 0

#764098 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:13

Yeah well us ginges are mighty mean to fuzz butts

deathmajestic | 0

#765610 - Sunday 10 January 2010 7:27

well at least she knows not to shave her ass

brianjman14 | 22

#1032708 - Wednesday 16 June 2010 21:41

very very true

caligurls | 0

#1072120 - Wednesday 7 July 2010 23:56

this is when u tell him u like the fuzz on his ass too and slide ur hand down, stroke it, smile, and say 'ooooh fuzzzz-yyy!!'

nicoleclark | 0

#3609292 - Sunday 20 November 2011 7:09

96- Learn to spell. Your comment actually makes you sound like a fucked up weirdo that doesn't even know English. ;/

By youdidwhatnow | 0

#764099 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:13

Ah, love!

Seth55_fml | 8

#3300547 - Friday 16 September 2011 23:18

What a wonderfull thing :)

By Firate | 3

#764104 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:14

At least he likes it?

By paprikacha | 9

#764120 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:19

I don't know...this one is kinda cute instead of FYL. : )

zourwolfe | 0

#2257419 - Monday 28 March 2011 22:47

By douchbaggins | 0

#764139 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:24

Do you have an ass like fozzy bear?

By nubster | 0

#764146 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:28

da fk is 'fuzz on ur butt' is that some kinda bush-like hair on ur ass?

Whydoyouask | 11

#769795 - Tuesday 12 January 2010 6:36

L.M.A.O. stupid comment but made me laugh so hard lol.

By Peacewind | 0

#764163 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:35

that's kinda cute lol

By madoka_fml | 0

#764165 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:37

Thorough shaving is advised. Ewwwww...

mcxhunni | 0

#2705514 - Saturday 18 June 2011 2:33

everyone has hairs on their ass. what, do you shave your butt? 0.o

By melmcr | 0

#764169 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:38

lmao.. fyl

By Docsecret | 0

#764175 - Saturday 9 January 2010 16:42